Faubert Shock!

The world of football was reeling today with the shock news that Real Madrid will not be exercising their option to buy Julian Faubert on a permanent deal in the summer. Having had hardly any opportunity to show what he can do, the West Ham and France star is to be sent packing when the present season ends. Once again, it seems, Jaunde Ramos has managed to pull disaster from the jaws of opportunity.

Faubert himself has spoken of his disappointment at the decision. Ever the self effacing, modest, diplomat, the Flying Frenchman (returning no doubt on Ryanair) has refused to criticise Ramos or the Spanish giants, although he must be stunned by the decision. As missed opportunities go, this is surely up there with Leeds United's decision to sell Cantona to Manchester United.

"The boy is a genius", said Faubert's mystified agent. "Madrid have simply failed to get the best out of him. People were surprised when the deal was initially announced and questioned the sanity of Ramos, but Julian and I knew that his performances at West Ham did not reflect his true ability. The English game is far too rough and tumble for somebody like Julian. He is an artist, not a painter and decorator. West Ham wanted him to, how do you say in English, bosh, bosh, bosh, but Julian wanted to create a work of art. And that takes time. It isn't all about going round a full back and whipping in a cross, it is about style and finesse. The Va Va Voom as Thiery Henry describes it."

Poor Faubert now faces the unhappy prospect of returning to the Hammers and suffering the taunts of the fans and the brutal training regimes at the club. "It will be a living hell for him," his agent Totale Merde told us. "I only hope that one of the other major clubs see sense and sign him. Who knows, he could be a Manchester United, Barcelona or Milan player by the start of next season."