Half Time Newcastle 3 West Ham 0 - Pathetic

This is beyond a joke. I avoided using the F word in that opening sentence but only just. We are a complete shambles.

The first goal was a long ball, pure and simple, and we were defending so deep, we were six foot under with the earth being piled on top. Yes Lovenkraands played a lovely ball to Best and he finished beautifully, but defensively we were all over the place.

The second saw us ripped apart down our right flank with the defence collectively in a coma. When the cross came over, Gabbidon had the chance to clear but he picked out Best perfectly and the Newcastle man said thanks very much and buried the chance.

Goal three was even worse. We cleared the first ball - but of course we didn't clear it properly so in it came again - straight to Tomkins who picked out Nolan of all people with our second attempt to clear and, it was goal number three and soon as it left his boot. Nolan's chicken style celebration said it all. We are gutless certainly and absolute turkeys into the bargain. How appropriate therefore that we are being stuffed.

The midfield is awful. Parker can't find a man in a West Ham shirt, Noble is out of position and ineffective on the left, Sears can't keep up with Guitierrez and nor can Ben Haim for that matter and Kovac has been absolutely diabolical. Up front Cole and Piquionne have also been awful in the rare occasions that the ball has found them.

This has to be sorted out. Why the hell do these players down tools as soon as they are asked to travel North. This is the Liverpool game all over again - we just have not competed.

Obinna must come on for Kovac. Move Noble inside, play Obinna wide left and pray it doesn't end up as six or seven! And Wolves are beating Chelsea!