Challenge To Ray Winstone To Lead Fan Group Buy Out

This blog ran a proposal yesterday for a fan buy out of the club as outlined below:

The proposal is simple. To raise the £100m necessary, 50,000 fans need to chip in £2,000 each to buy a single share in the club. 49% of the club is then given, free of charge, to an investor willing to commit a net £20m a year to purchasing players for each of the next 5 years, whilst funding the day to day running of the club.

How would the fans find 2k to buy their stake? Well on mortgage, this would cost no more than £8 per month! £8 a month to own a stake in the club and to save that club from imminent demise? I'm in!

And who would take the 49% stake? Well Sullivan seems to have something similar in mind and I'm sure there are wealthier investors than him who would be prepared to commit!

Pie in the sky? Well better pie in the sky than the piss in the wind that all the other offers seem to amount to!

Not surprisingly, others have raised objections, the most legitimate of which include who would lead the buy out and how would 50,000 fans agree on anything?

Let's deal with the second point first. The share purchased for £2,000 would be a non voting share as I envisage it, like preference shares. Who would make up the Board? Well, I would allow the preference share holders to initially vote on nominations put forward by a merchant bank appointed to represent their interests. That Board would then vote on replacements when necessary. Trevor Brooking would be a permanent member of the Board, if he would accept the position, and so would Tony Carr, as a reward for his outstanding contribution to the club. That would act as some sort of guarantee that the club's heritage and soul is represented at Board level. In time, they could be replaced by subsequent West Ham heroes.

The preference share would entitle the owner to a 20% discount on season ticket purchasers, meaning that the money would be recovered by true fans over a 10 year period. For the occasional fans, a 10% discount could apply to ticket purchases. All preference share holders would be entitled to attend events where they could meet the players and ask questions of the manager and Board.

Who would lead the buy out? Well we would need a high profile fan of the club. How about Ray Winstone? I am throwing down the challenge to him and all West Ham fans! Let's save the soul of the club we love!

Fans Should Buy West Ham

I can't claim credit for this idea, it came from a poster on the Org who, subsequently, has been banned. I thought I would bring it to a wider audience.

The proposal is simple. To raise the £100m necessary, 50,000 fans need to chip in £2,000 each to buy a single share in the club. 49% of the club is then given, free of charge, to an investor willing to commit a net £20m a year to purchasing players for each of the next 5 years, whilst funding the day to day running of the club.

How would the fans find 2k to buy their stake? Well on mortgage, this would cost no more than £8 per month! £8 a month to own a stake in the club and to save that club from imminent demise? I'm in!

And who would take the 49% stake? Well Sullivan seems to have something similar in mind and I'm sure there are wealthier investors than him who would be prepared to commit!

Pie in the sky? Well better pie in the sky than the piss in the wind that all the other offers seem to amount to!

Plimpsole Line On The Claret And Blue Hull

This weekend is truly do or die. I well remember saying, the season we went down, that if we couldn't beat West Brom we would be relegated. We lost at home 1-0 in just the fourth game of the season and, as far as I was concerned, the writing was on the wall from that point forward. The critical defeat in the end was, of course, the 1-0 reverse at Bolton five games before the season ended and even a Trevor Brooking inspired Great Escape was not enough to keep us afloat.

Well if we lose at Hull, that is curtains. Hull are a poor team managed by a dead man walking and, despite their victory over Stoke, are there for the taking. If we can't beat that pile of shite, we don't belong in the Prem.

But how will Zola play it? Will there be echoes of that Bolton defeat, when we waited until we were behind before we looked like we wanted to win? Unfortunately Zola's approach has been to give the opposition a goal or two start before turning to his cavalry. Well, in my opinion, we cannot adopt a negative approach for this game. Cole is back and so is Ilunga. Diamanti must start at the top of a diamond, with Franco paired with Cole, and Hines and Stanislas available if necessary when the opposition defenders tire. Parker, Behrami and Collison pick themselves in midfield and Da Costa has earned the right to partner Upson in the centre of defence. Faubert or Spector at right back? I would go for Spector's extra height personally.

Zola must send out a positive message with his selection and the players should be told to wipe the floor with these toothless tigers! Should we lose, we will be hulled below the water line and the good ship West Ham will sink without trace, with the rats abandoning ship as soon as the January transfer window opens!

Another Day Another Defeat

It seems losing is now endemic. The reserves turned up at Norwich tonight and, against the stiffs of an old Division Three team, managed to go a goal down in the opening minute and lose 2-1. Of course the OS stresses that we were fielding a young side whilst Norwich had as many as THREE fringe Division Three players in their team; well that's okay then!

When a malaise sets in, it is desperately hard to turn things around. When a club is doing well, everybody is buzzing. When defeat becomes the order of the day, the fight goes out of everybody. Some collective arses need to be kicked but does anybody feel confident and secure enough to kick them? Dixon was playing, so was Grasser. And Eyjolffson. And Kurucz. And Kearns. These have all represented their countries at U21 or U19 level and yet they cannot beat Norwich City Reserves! Dear God!

Cole Must Lead England's Line In South Africa

The more I think about it and the more I see of the contenders, the more certain I am that Carlton Cole should be leading the line in South Africa. Against Brazil we had no out ball, nobody who could take the ball, shield it and allow others to join in the game around him. Rooney was coming too deep in search of the ball and Bent was running the channels, encouraging the long ball over the top which Brazil gobbled up all night.

Once again we saw England's need for the big man, the target man, the guy who they could hit with a "get it up there quick ball" and the player who could suck in two opposition defenders as he collected it, creating space for Rooney and the midfield runners to break beyond the Brazilian defence. We saw Rooney nearly open them up on three occasions but his passes were intercepted by a massed and properly positioned Brazil defence and midfield screen. Had Cole or Heskey been playing and dropping back towards the midfield, defenders would have been drawn out of position and gaps created.

Why not Crouch? Well the guy is the best goal scorer of the three but he gives away even more free kicks than Cole when challenging for the ball. He is all arms and legs and international referees do not like what they see. His control is good but he lacks the physical strength necessary for the job and, for a tall man, he is surprisingly weak in the air.

I am a fan of Heskey but he isn't getting enough football and he is looking increasingly injury prone. He is probably the cutest of the options, better equipped at buying free kicks rather than conceding them but his scoring record is truly woeful. I know Cole isn't supposed to be the best in front of goal and hasn't yet netted at international level, but I'm willing to bet my house that after fifty caps he would have more than 10 goals. How many has Heskey got? Seven?

Carlton is not in the Shearer class but he is a bloody good target man. Zola and Capello should teach him the Shearer technique of collapsing forward under a defender's challenge to buy free kicks, and he could do with somebody playing up top with him at Upton Park to develop the skill of playing in team mates behind an opposition defence, but add those two skills to his game and he would look like the real deal. He is quick, he is strong, he is confident and his goals are coming at the rate of one every two games and are of all types - headers, right foot, left foot, outside box, inside box and inside the six yard box. I would back him to bag four goals if he played in every game through to the Final and I wouldn't fancy Heskey to score more than two.

So come on Carlton, rip Hull apart at the weekend and send a message to Fabio! And don't opt to be a Big 4 reserve, Emile can tell you how that undermines your England prospects!

Ten Million On Women's Sport? What A Waste Of Money!

Sport England are investing ten million pounds in grass roots women's sport; what a waste of money! Dear God, even sex is too much effort for them after marriage and triggers a headache, so what chance is there of them playing sport in the cold and the rain of the winter months exactly?

Don't you just love the sight of most female joggers? Their idea of jogging is to walk slightly slower, wobbling their hips from side to side in an exaggerated way, whilst gripping their hands in little fists out in front of them. Get too close and you hear the desperate sound of wheezing lungs and risk being clattered because they are so much "in the zone" that they can't see three feet ahead!

You don't need ten million quid for God's sake! Have you seen those pictures of a donkey chasing a carrot dangling just in front of its nose from a contraption fixed on top of its head? Well substitute a bar of chocolate for the carrot and it's job done! Or make it compulsory to jog around any clothes shop and to do twenty press ups before going into the changing room with any item in a sale!

All joking apart, what a waste of money. Ten million is far too little to make a significant difference and if we have that sort of money sloshing around, surely it could be put to better use! What could we do with ten million pounds? How many African lives might that save?

PG

Maradona and Sir Alex Ferguson

So what do the respective punishments of Maradona and Sir Alex Ferguson show? That if you rant about the media and upset the journalists, you are banned from any football activity for two months, but criticising a referee and calling him unfit is not so serious and results in only a fine and a touchline ban!

Surely the priorities are wrong here? What Ferguson said about Referee Willy was utterly unacceptable. The guy is in his forties and is still running up and down a football pitch trying to cover more ground over 90 minutes that some players less than half his age. Who runs more in a match, do you think, the referee or Berbatov? Not a difficult one to answer is it?

The FA and Premier league bottled it once again because it was Ferguson and Man Utd. Mind you, so have FIFA because the ban applying to Maradona will not cover any competitive fixtures and will mean he can manage in the World Cup finals if Argentina are mad enough to leave him in charge. Punishment? What punishment?

Well Said Wayne Rooney!

Good to see Rooney remaining positive after the Brazil game. He is quite right, we were fielding a reserve team and Brazil were virtually at full strength. It would be interesting to see what would happen if the positions were reversed, with England missing two and Brazil 9 of their first picks. Remember, we are not talking bits and pieces players but our entire first choice defence plus no Lampard, Gerrard, Hargreaves, Joe Cole, Carrick, Lennon, Beckham or Walcott. Take out that many quality midfielders and any team would struggle, especially when pitched against the number one side in the world!

The most surprising thing is how few genuine chances Brazil carved out in the circumstances. I said it on an earlier post and I will say it again, they looked impressive but there is no reason to be scared of them. With a first choice 11, we can beat them, especially if there is a chill in the air. It is no coincidence that Brazilians have struggled to make a mark in England!

So well said Wayne, others may scoff but I agree, we can beat them - if we have to. This Brazilian team may well come unstuck against the likes of Spain or a spoiling Italy anyway!

Coles to South Africa

Okay, South Africa is famous for mining a slightly more valuable form of compressed carbon, but yesterday's game showed that, to win the World Cup, England need to ship as much Cole to Cape Town and Jo burg as possible.

Up front, we looked lightweight without the big man to win and hold on to the ball. Heskey may still be the man in possession but, as every week passes, Carlton Cole's claims grow stronger. He is outscoring Heskey and looks a far better all round player to me. I can see Cole leading the line in South Africa, not just making up the squad!

Ashley Cole is a banker for the left back berth. Bridge coped surprisingly well defensively last night but offered nothing going forward. His nightmare against Burnley may still have been nagging at him but he seemed to think that the pitch stopped at the half way line. Cole would have offered more of a threat down the left and might have given Brazil something to worry about themselves.

Joe Cole is the forgotten man. Playing either on the right or left, he has to be a better option than either Wright-Phillips or Milner. Last night, we saw plenty of endeavour from England but very little in the way of class. Apart from Rooney, Joe Cole is probably the only English player with the same level of natural ability as the Brazilians - although Walcott admirers might dispute that.

So we might lack real diamonds but we have the Coles necessary to succeed!

Green Reject

Capello's decision to pick Foster against Brazil, despite his playing only one competitive game in the last month, shows that Green is now very far from England's number one number one. He has been given his chance but hasn't done enough to convince Capello that he has what it takes to make it at the highest level.

If we are honest, Foster looks more the part physically. He also looks more commanding. Like Gordon Brown, Green is being betrayed by his facial expressions apart from anything else. He always has this slightly perplexed look on his face; whereas Foster just looks focused. In recent games I have been amazed at Green's placidity when tall opposition players are stationed in front of him. Rob just accepts it and stands there as if he is in a bus queue. No wonder he struggles on corners, he can't see the bloody ball when it is kicked! The guy on the near post must be shouting: "He's running up to take it, he's kicked it, looks like it might be going long, your ball Rob, your ball!"

He remains a great shot stopper and might have a role in a penalty shoot out but, as I have always maintained, Green is not an international keeper. He lacks the authority and speed of thought to be the best.

Cole Situation Shows Stupidity Of How We Are Run

If Manchester United and Liverpool are genuinely willing to offer £20m for Cole, then how crazy is it that we cannot afford to accept it because, to do so, would spell certain relegation? I am a huge admirer of Cole but is he really worth £20m? Go back 12 months and we would have all said cash in if an offer of £10m had been received. He has undoubtedly improved but has he improved that much?

Had we had alternatives in the squad, the sensible thing to do would be to sell and use the money to buy three Premiership quality players. But with no options, the bulk of the money - even if Zola was allowed to spend it - would have to go on funding the purchase of two strikers anyway and as they would not come from inside the Prem, what guarantee would we have that they would succeed? We are after this Chamakh guy but do any of us know how good he is? I'm happy to admit that I have no idea! So what would we gain from selling Cole? We move on a guy who we know can play in the Prem and gamble on two we are unsure of. Not sensible in my opinion.

Of course, the signings of Green and Cole (heavily criticised by Curbishley when he joined) show the right way to run a club like West Ham. We shouldn't be splashing out huge sums on kids like Savio or crocks like Dyer, we should be buying "value", like Behrami and Ilunga, and we should have a squad big enough to allow us to take silly offers when the big boys get desperate. Is Cole worth £20m? No. Can we afford to sell him? No. That is stupid! Pardew got it right - look at the profit we showed when we moved on Harewood, Reo-Coker, Onecapchesky, Etherington, Zamora, Paintsil and Collins; and I have probably forgotten somebody! No, Tevez doesn't count!

Mind you, if I was Cole, I wouldn't want to join Liverpool or United ahead of the World Cup. There is a real danger that, like Heskey, he will find himself on the subs bench most of the time. Of course a move to one of the glamour clubs will have appeal but Zola should remind him of his time at Chelsea. Watching England last night, Cole could be in the team in South Africa - but to be there, he needs lots of games in the Prem. And if he stays fit, he is guaranteed games at West Ham because we don't have an alternative!

Brazil 1 England 0 - So what?

Never in the field of conflict in sport was so much fuss made over so little. Yes Brazil beat our reserves 1-0 in absurdly hot conditions, yes had they scored the penalty it would have been more clear cut, yes Foster should have been sent off, but so what? No Gerrard, no Lampard, no Ashley Cole, no Terry, no Ferdinand, no Walcott, no Lennon, no Beckham, no Hargreaves, no Joe Cole, no Carlton Cole, no Nevilles and no David James turned the game into a total farce.

What did Capello learn from that exactly? Bent isn't good enough. Think we knew that. Jenas isn't either. Well there's a surprise. Wright-Phillips is short of the necessary class. Big surprise there to anybody who remembers him at Chelsea. Brown is a yard dog. Really, we would never have guessed!

To be fair, Upson (two embarrassing incidents apart), Lescott, Bridge and Milner coped better than I expected. With a reasonable right back, we might have got out of this with a draw. With creative flair in midfield, who knows we might beat this Brazil team.

So, a waste of everybody's time as far as I'm concerned: thank God Rooney didn't break a leg!

Is Tottenham's Huddlestone the real deal?

Brazil are possibly going to give a debut to their Hulk in today's game and there is every possibility that we will see Tottenham's hulk making his bow for England at the same time. My question is, how good is this guy?

Tottenham fans themselves seem to be divided on him in the same way as we are split on Noble. Some maintain that he is the dog's bollocks and just needs to be given the top dog role to blossom; others reserve judgement, feeling that Huddlestone is too slow and too lazy to make it at the highest level.

He certainly is a physical presence on the pitch and should enhance the team's options at set pieces, both defensively and offensively. And like Carrick, he can pick a pass. The trouble is, does he make the most of his strength and power or is he a bit like Nikolay Valuev, cumbersome and punching below his weight?

This isn't an anti Tottenham article, I am genuinely undecided. When there were rumours that Tottenham might let him go, I was keen for West Ham to buy him and, despite his club, I would love to see Huddlestone come through as a giant in the England midfield. Beckham can't go on for ever and we need somebody who can spot and deliver a forty yard pass.

So, what are people's views on the guy? The question is open to Tottenham and West Ham fans alike!

A Game To Miss Greenie!

If I was Robert Green, I'd be keeping my fingers crossed that Capello starts with somebody else between the sticks against Brazil. Hopefully Terry will be fit but if not, I can't see a defence reading Shite Brown, Kryten Lescott, Pick Yourself Upson and Hump Back Bridge offering the keeper much protection.

The worry, for those of us who hold out genuine hopes of an England triumph in the World Cup, is the paucity of defensive cover that this illustrates. After his performance against the mighty Burnley, Hansen said he felt sorry for Wayneker Bridge and that same magnificent Burnley exposed Kryten Lescott as a red faced dwarf of a Premiership defender. Burnley, remember, hadn't picked up a single away point all season yet took a two goal lead and, when out on their collective feet, were still invited to score a third by a hapless and hopeless Bridge. As well as the Burnley boys battled, I don't think even their most die hard fans would claim that they have a Kaka in their ranks!

Meanwhile, on the right side of the defence, Capello has no alternative other than Wes Brown. What the Hell is going on? I know Gary Neville has been out for a year and Phil Neville is currently unavailable, but surely there must be a full back or two worthy of selection ahead of Bridge or Brown? The decision to call up Luke Young shows that the cupboard really is empty. Capello should change his name to Old Mother Hubbard! He's got Kryten in the squad; and from what I've seen this season, Fabio might as well have gone with the rest of the Red Dwarf boys for his back four! Let's face it, since Collins has gone, Upson has been a hologram of his former self!

So if I was Green, I might wake up this morning to a twinge in my back. "I'll play boss if you really need me but..."

Princess Behind Bid To Buy West Ham

The Daily Express has exclusively revealed that Princess Diana is behind a bid to buy her beloved West Ham United. After dying in a tragic car crash in Paris, orchestrated by Prince Phillip and Prince Charles because they support Tottenham Hotspurs, the Princess has been plotting in Heaven to secure the long term future of the club she supported from childhood.

Royal butler Paul Burrell told the Express reporter: "Diana was a passionate West Ham fan and had pictures of the Hammers greats like Mr Bobby Moore, Mr Billy Bonds, Mr Ian Bishop and Mrs Trevor Morley on her bedroom wall. She was attracted to the club because it typified the poor working classes, chirpy Cockneys who had escaped chimney cleaning to play on their field of dreams. I know that when alive, Diana harboured hopes of becoming the club's Mary Poppins but, unfortunately, Charles and Phillip frustrated her intentions of buying the club because of their Tottenham Hotspurs affiliations."

He continued: "I know that she was very uneasy when the club was bought out by the Icelandic bankers. The night the news broke, Diana spoke to me in my dreams and I saw the polar ice caps melting and the Thames Barrier breached."

Asked how Diana could help the hapless Hammers now she is dead, Burrell replied: "Diana moves in mysterious ways. I know she has the ear of God and is making personal representations on behalf of the club. It is my hope that after reading this, CEO Mr Scott Duxbury will build a shrine to Diana at Upton Park and encourage fans to pray at every game. In fact, given the rumours that Straumer still want £120m for the club and are planning to sell Mr Carlton Cole and Mr Matthew Upson to service the massive debts, this may be the only hope."

Burrell also offered to help himself. "Diana left me her West Ham scarf and I believe it has magic qualities. I wore it for the first time when West Ham won against Aston Villa. As dear as this scarf is to me, because of the memories I have of seeing Diana wearing it as she settled down in front of the television to watch West Ham games on Sky, I would be prepared to part with it, should a suitable offer be made from the club or from a West Ham fan."

The news will shock Fulham owner Mohammed Al Fayed, who assumed that Diana had been murdered because of the sympathy she showed for cottagers and the fear within the British establishment that the son she was carrying at the time of her death, would be raised as a Muslim Fundamentalist Fulham fan.

It appears that all may not be lost for West Ham after all. The Express story of Gold buying the club may have no legs but with Diana onside, how can West Ham fail?

West Ham CEO Scott Duxbury was unavailable for comment.

Injury to Tottenham's Carlo Cudicini bad news for West Ham fans

The injury to Cudicini spells bad news for our hopes of holding on to Robert Green. As if the failure by Duxbury to give him an improved contract was not bad enough, the last thing we needed was for Redknapp, already dubious about Gomes, to lose his understudy keeper.

Now it must be odds on that 'Arry will be bidding for one of Green, Robinson or James. The mounting injury problems being suffered by Calamity suggest that age is getting the better of him and, as brave as he is, even Redknapp may baulk at the prospect of bringing Red Faced Robbo back to the Lane. Which kind of makes his target number one as Robert Green, if only by default.

Upson is already on 'Arry's shopping list. Who would bet against a double deal come January?

One last thought, can you believe Premiership clubs allow players to ride motorbikes?

Sears Can Go To Hell!

Get this from Freddie Parrot Face Sears! Talking to that maginificent rag, The Croydon Advertiser, Sears is quoted as saying,

"I've loved my time here (Crystal Palace) from day one. I really want to stay for the rest of the season and repay the faith the manager (Neil Warnock!) and fans have shown in me. All the lads in the dressing room have been asking me what I'd do if we went up and West Ham went down. You just don't know what's going to happen. I'm not saying that I don't want to go back to West Ham but, as I say, I've loved my time here and think the club can really push on in the next couple of years."

Well doesn't that reveal a passion for West Ham? Doesn't that show how grateful he is for all the support he has received from Zola and the West Ham fans? Doesn't that carve him out as a guy who has West Ham dear to his heart? Doesn't that indicate a guy who has huge faith in the management and playing staff of West Ham?

Asked what you would do if West ham were relegated Freddie, you might just say, "West Ham go down? No chance!"

Celtic and Rangers? Who Needs Them?

No idea what Gitside was on about with this rubbish idea of inviting the Glasgow misfits into the Premier League. Why would we want to do that exactly? Most Premiership grounds are close to full anyway so they can't really add much to the money pot for the existing clubs can they?

Of course, the likes of Peterborough would benefit as the Jocks made their debut in the Fizzy Pop. The good people of Peterborough might choose to give the ground a wide berth but the Tartan hoardes should be able to fill the place without any need for home support.

But then what? After a couple of seasons Rangers might build a squad strong enough to climb into the Prem but without a change of manager, Celtic would struggle to finish in the top half of the Championship!

The truth of the matter is that the Glasgow Want Aways need the Premiership far more than the Premiership needs them. Outside of Glasgow, football is now a minority sport in Scotand. In fact, every sport seems to be a minority sport in Scotland these days - oh how they must yearn for Kenny Dalglish, Andy Irvine and Alan Wells. The arrival of the Stonner has a lot to answer for.

So, I understand the craving of the Jocks to join the real Prem but, sadly for them, the real Prem doesn't need them! We already fund their social security, pay for their sprogs to go to University and let their politicians destroy our economy, so why should we subsidise their football teams exactly?

Selling The Club Down The River Mersey

So reports are suggesting that we have set a price for Carlton Cole. £20m. Some might argue that Liverpool are willing to meet that valuation, we should sell him; and as big a fan as I am, I can understand the logic - but only if the money was to be reinvested.

The trouble is, of course, that the cash will simply be absorbed by the debt mountain. C&B Holdings now know that nobody is going to meet their inflated valuation whilst taking on the monumental debt. Any £100m offer will be for the club without the debt - eg £50m to clear the debt and £50 for the club and all its assets. So that leaves the banks with just £50m tops for the club itself. So what would you do in their shoes, assuming you have no love for the club and don't care what happens to it after you have disposed of the "asset"?

Simples as my friend Hierros Bill would say! You sell players, use the cash to reduce the debt, and so increase the net value of the £100m offer. By selling Cole, C&B Holdings pocket £70m instead of just £50m. Sell two of Green, Behrami and Upson, and you could nearly be up to your target figure!

But that would spell certain relegation! So what, with the club sold for £50m, that would no longer be Straumer's problem. But who would then pay £100m for the club? Nobody would have to, the club would now be available at £50m, not a bad price for a London club in the Fizzy Pop with zero debts and a loyal fan base who could be guaranteed to nearly fill Upton Park every game. With the parachute payment, it might look like a tidy investment. No wonder Intermarket and Sullivan are sniffing.

There's that old East End saying: where there's muck, there's brass. Well West Ham are sure in the shit so...

How Crap Are Liverpool?

I blogged on here at the start of the season that the wheels were about to come off at Liverpool and so it is proving. The squad is ridiculously thin and now, it seems, Torres is not prepared to put his body on the line for the team. His no show against Birmingham says it all. With an international break to follow, you would have thought that the Spaniard could have given the team 60 minutes. Benitez seemed to think so, based on his comments at the weekend. But apparently not.

Real Madrid will be looking for a new manager soon and it is hard to see Benitez resisting the challenge to jump ship. This team is going nowhere and if Liverpool miss out on the Champions League come the end of the season, then those massive debts will start to strangle the life out of the club. If Benitez goes, will Torres follow? Why would he want to hang around at a mid table team already knocked out of Europe? If Torres and Benitez go, why would Gerrard want to stay? Might he not fancy a few years in the Real Madrid midfield to top off his, as yet, not so terribly illustrious career?

Of course, when I predicted Liverpool's demise at the start of the season, I was told I didn't know what I was talking about; just as I was mocked when I predicted we would struggle to avoid relegation. Well, a 2-2 draw against Birmingham, only secured through blatant cheating, suggests I might know something about the game of football, or Soccer as Liverpool's owners call it, after all!