Ward of Court

I can't see old West Ham favourite Mark Ward being offered a job by either the FA or the Liverpool Tourist Board anytime soon after his interview with the Independent. Unfortunately he didn't say "I adjusted to prison well because I'm used to taking hard tackles from behind" but he did claim that modern Premiership players mix with the criminal class on a daily basis. Well, I suppose that's true at West Ham given BG's history and Tottenham where the club captain could have a criminal record anytime soon (although 'Arry might be able to give him a few tips on how to stay one step ahead of the law!). And John Terry does have to see his Mum from time to time I suppose!

According to Ward, keeping your nose clean, when earning millions every year for playing the game most of us gladly play for nowt, is a very tricky business. He says, “It will be a rare day that a Premier League player can go from morning to night and not be introduced to or speak to somebody involved in the drugs trade or some other form of criminality."

Wow, that is quite a claim! So if I'm a policeman, I can forget staking out pubs in downtown Deptford and just put a tail on John Terry and company. Crimewatch will be scrapped soon, instead they can double up with Match of the Day and save airtime.

Mind you, the choicest quote relates to Liverpool. Pembleton mate, you should write to your wife's MP and complain because, according to Wardy, “That was true for me, especially growing up in Huyton on Merseyside where you socialise daily with people involved in crime." And there was me thinking it was only a stereotype!

Ever the optimist, Ward is now hoping to return to football in some capacity, but he admitted: “It’s going to take a big, strong man to give me another chance.” I guess he is talking about a gangster hood employed as a centre back for Liverpool FC then?