Tuesday, 15 December 2009
Bolton 3 West Ham 1 - A "Comedy" of Errors!
One flash of brilliance apart, with Ilunga, Franco, Collison and Diamanti actually stringing passes together and Diamanti scoring, we were awful. Some people were saying that we were too good to go down; bollocks, we are too bad to stay up! Time and again school boy errors result in us conceding whilst "creatively", we are utterly and completely clueless. Such is our paucity of options up front that Zola was reduced to sending on Da Costa to play as a striker. What a bloody joke! I thought that was why we bought Diamanti?
Let's go through the goals conceded. The first resulted from Tomkins giving away the ball three times in the space of 30 seconds. The first time, under no pressure whatsoever, he handed away possession. From the resulting attack, he had another opportunity to clear but he gave away possession again, the ball came back in again and it was Tomkins' head that failed to get distance on the clearance. Back came Bolton and this time they scored.
The second goal was an absolute joke. Green, an England keeper? I always maintained the guy was over rated and boy is he proving it this season. He is a bundle of nerves each time he plays Bolton because they are his bogey team, so just imagine what he would be like in a World Cup semifinal! His error tonight was even worse than the first one at Upton Park last season!
And the third goal? A straightforward cross into our six yard box from a corner which reached the back of the six yard box where Cahill outjumped Tomkins and nodded it home. Easy peasy, West Ham squeazy.
What is there to say about this shambles? Nothing. Zola's tactics were again all at sea as I said in my half time report. The idiot even chose Da Costa up front instead of Stanislas when he found himself losing yet again. Clarke didn't seem to get off his arse all match and at no point did Zola even try to swap his "wide" players again. Idiot, buffoon, moron, fool - call him what you will. He needs to wear a jester's outfit, not a tracksuit, he is a complete tactical clown.
Where do we go from here - apart from down? Faubert can't stay at right back, he was dreadful all game. Tomkins can't stay at centre back, he was to blame for two of the goals. Parker looks dispirited. Collison is looking jaded. Diamanti looks good in flashes but only in very brief flashes, like an SOS signal from a sinking ship. Chelsea want Green? They can have him! Parker has already joined Liverpool it seems to me. He gave up against Man United and has looked fed up since. Kovac is Kovac, I think that is the Czech spelling for crap. Stanislas is hopeless on the left because he doesn't have a left foot. Gabbidon is ordinary. Ilunga played Lee onside for the first goal and actually managed to concede a foul throw in the first half. Have I forgotten anybody? Dyer? Don't make me laugh. 20 minutes and off! Surely he should follow Ashton into early retirement? Franco? Poor bloody Franco. He must think he has come out of the tunnel on his own for all he sees in terms of attacking support!
Just think, some clowns thought we would be better without Carlton Cole! Well, you have got what you wished for Grumpy! And to all you morons who criticised this blog for warning what was going to happen this season, how bloody stupid are you looking now? Almost as stupid as Zola!
Player Ratings: Green 3; Faubert 1 Tomkins 2 Gabbidon 6, Ilunga 5 (he was involved in the build up to the goal!); Diamanti 3 (Hopeless apart from the goal), Parker 6, Kovac 5, Collison 5, Stanislas 4; Franco 6 - Dyer (The numbers on my keyboard have broken down!)
For suckers for punishment, my account of the first half is carried below! Not far wrong again you will see!
Zola predicted Dyer wouldn't last 90 minutes but he picked him anyway - and he just about managed 20. Ashton has retired, surely Dyer should follow his lead. What a monumental waste of money the guy is.
Tactically, Zola is excelling in idiocy again tonight. Okay Bolton haven't scored yet but only because they are crap, or have been so far. Tomkins and Faubert have been guilty of two of the most derisory pieces of defending I have ever seen, Tomkins misjudging the bounce o the ball in keystone cops fashion and Faubert delivering his best cross so far this season, into the middle of his own penalty box! Add in Collison trying to dribble across the front of his own penalty box and losing possession and that shows the level of incompetence on display.
Time and again, we are losing possession in our own half. Why? Because there is nobody to play the ball to up front. Franco is half a pitch a way from any supporting players and at some point, probably at half time, Bolton are going to wake up to the fact that they don't need four men to mark him! Yet again, Diamanti and Stanislas are on the wrong flanks so again we cannot get the ball into crossing positions. We reach the edge of the box, then go nowhere because any runner will be offside unless somebody goes past a defender and pulls the ball back. It is so bloody obvious! But Zola still can't see it!
Bolton will score second half and I can't see how we will. Diamanti and Franco have barely touched the ball and creatively, we are not at the races. The only solution is to move Stanislas up front, switch Collison wide right and Diamanti wide left, then we might see us progress into Bolton's half at least. The long out ball to Stanislas might even be an option!
I would say that first half was dire but Dyer didn't manage half of the first half did he? And to add to the sheer incompetence, Ilunga took a foul throw in his own half and Dyer was stripped and in the bath before Stanislas even got off the sub's bench. My prediction? 2-0.
Pathetic!
Bye :-)
ReplyDelete"Don't worry about a thing,
ReplyDelete'Cause every little thing gonna be all right.
Singin': "Don't worry about a thing,
'Cause every little thing gonna be all right!"
Rise up this mornin',
Smiled with the risin' sun,
Three little birds
Pitch by my doorstep
Singin' sweet songs
Of melodies pure and true,
Sayin', ("This is my message to you-ou-ou:")
Singin': "Don't worry 'bout a thing,
'Cause every little thing gonna be all right."
Singin': "Don't worry (don't worry) 'bout a thing,
'Cause every little thing gonna be all right!"
Rise up this mornin',
Smiled with the risin' sun,
Three little birds
Pitch by my doorstep
Singin' sweet songs
Of melodies pure and true,
Sayin', "This is my message to you-ou-ou:"
Singin': "Don't worry about a thing, worry about a thing, oh!
Every little thing gonna be all right. Don't worry!"
Singin': "Don't worry about a thing" - I won't worry!
"'Cause every little thing gonna be all right."
Singin': "Don't worry about a thing,
'Cause every little thing gonna be all right" - I won't worry!
Singin': "Don't worry about a thing,
'Cause every little thing gonna be all right."
Singin': "Don't worry about a thing, oh no!
'Cause every little thing gonna be all right!
I feel better already, we've been through all this before. We are WEST HAM UTD. UP THE HAMMERS!!
ReplyDeleteToo bad to stay up? Nah, worse teams than us have stayed up through the years. we played one of them tonight! Then there's Southampton, Coventry, both of who made relegation struggles their annual plaything. We are bad though and need points desperately. I can't see any coming before the new year though and in that we play Pompey!!! Man do we need Carlton back and soon!
ReplyDeleteI was gonna give Tomkins that boll***ing. Those three 'clearances' were almost funny.
ReplyDeleteShould have been Da Costa and Gabbidon. The latter had a very good game.
Savvakis mentioned it in a previous post and tonight's game was a clear illustration of the lack of commitment and conviction in our play.
The only positive from tonight's game... if we need to find 3 teams in the prem who are worse than us then we have found one. Sadly we don't even have the belief to beat them at the moment.
ReplyDeleteZola thinks tactics are something you use to keep your breath fresh, Green seems to have a boot deal with Readymix, Tomkins is not ready for this level yet.
The only thing keeping me going is the baying pack who think our relegation will be some kind of justice. It ain't looking great but there's I too far to go yet for me to throw the towel in.
I'm throwing the towell in, along with my trainer, promoter and cutman. There is only a limited amount of times I can call our performances pathetic before the word becomes ineffective and a huge understatement. I think I have underestimated HF's opinions in the past, because I simply couldn't live with predicting awful performances from West Ham before they happen. However, I now exactly what to expect from this team, and I urge others to listen to hammersfan before you slate him.
ReplyDeleteDyer should consider retirement, as every fan was just as frustrated as he was.
P.S HF how comes you know the game in such detail, do you watch the games somewhere?
From what i saw on the devils eyeball, a fair evaluation of our performance. A low quality match all round. On a cheery note, if we can keep the coach & the squad that we have now, & they can keep their current attitude & level of motivation, next year we can beat Scunthorpe.
ReplyDeleteIf Portsmouth win we go bottom. YAY
ReplyDeleteAgree with everything you say HF.
ReplyDeleteWe are just not good enough to stay up. No Great Escape II this season.
We have been done in by injuries, poor management and players simply not doing what they are paid handsomely to do.
The only players I rate are Parker, whose morale is rock bottom and Franco who tries hard.
Diamante, Serie B quality, a flash in the pan.
Kovac is just appalling, what does he actually do for us?
Faubert has to go too. Rubbish defender.
The rest of them are either young and not good enough yet like Stanislas, Tomkins and Collison, or senior players that should know better, like Ilunga, Gabbidon and Green.
This feels like a relegation season through and through, and the last time we went down, how much better was that team?
We have not got a hope in hell; it feels like a curse supporting this bloody team at times.
"Kovac is Kovac, I think that is the Czech spelling for crap"
ReplyDeleteThat is a classic quote. Sorry but I just hate that dude.
I like West Ham but hey, I would not be suprised if they end up in the Coke league.
Oh well, que sera, sera.
TIS, I am just a manic depressive. If I predict disaster often enough, it is bound to happen one day!
ReplyDeleteBut seriously, I could not believe the way we were sleep walking into disaster and the way nobody was expressing concern. How could we start a Premiership season with only one forward who had scored in the top division os any league in the world? Wasn't it obvious that Cole would get injured or suspended sooner or later.
I have supported West Ham long enough to know the Joey Beauchamp Rule: If it can go wrong, it will go wrong; with bloody knobs on!
If your question is serious, I do watch games as critically (as in analysis) as possible. I do make my fair share of mistakes though - I would have let Neill go - but if you make judgement calls and "put them out there", you are going to look foolish sometimes. I enjoy the exchanges, including with yourself, and learn from the debates.
We need a Hartson and kitson partnership. We need Repka's eyes and Dicks' left boot. We need Ruddock's....errm....yes. Some of the greasy mamma's boys we have in our team at the moment just haven't got the fight in them.
ReplyDelete