Tuesday, 19 January 2010

And after the takeover, what happens now?


Presumably Duxbury clears his desk and Brady installs a full length mirror and a sofa bed. Valon Behrami may find himself called into her office early doors, I'm sure Karen will admire his elfish looks and limitless stamina. Or maybe Kovac may appeal more now that she has matured?

Topless waitresses in the hospitality suite perhaps? A double page spread in the programme of a model going down on a chimp under the heading "Blowing Bubbles"? A new look to page three?

How soon before Barratt are marketing Boleyn Mansions, a development of prestige apartments on the doorstep of the City? No wonder Sullivan and Gold want to be caretakers of the Olympic Stadium when it will enable them to redevelop the current ground! And perhaps that's why Straumur fancy retaining a 49% stake!

It has to be good news in the short term but into the future? Why does the name Faustus come to mind?

O West Ham,
Now hast thou but one bare hour to live,
And then thou must be damn'd perpetually!
Stand still, you ever-moving spheres of heaven,
That time may cease, and midnight never come;
Fair Nature's eye, rise, rise again, and make
Perpetual day; or let this hour be but
A year, a month, a week, a natural day,
That the club may repent and save his soul!
O lente, lente currite, noctis equi!
The stars move still, time runs, the clock will strike,
The devil will come, and West Ham must be damn'd.
O, I'll leap up to heaven!—Who pulls me down?—
See, where Christ's blood streams in the firmament!
One drop of blood will save me: O my Christ!—
Rend not my heart for naming of my Christ;
Yet will I call on him: O, spare me, Lucifer!—
Where is it now? 'tis gone:
And, see, a threatening arm, an angry brow!
Mountains and hills, come, come, and fall on me,
And hide me from the heavy wrath of heaven!
No!
Then will I headlong run into the earth:
Gape, earth! O, no, it will not harbour me!
You stars that reign'd at my nativity,
Whose influence hath allotted death and hell,
Now draw up West Ham, like a foggy mist,
Into the entrails of yon labouring clouds,
That, when you vomit forth into the air,
My limbs may issue from your smoky mouths;
But let my soul mount and ascend to heaven!
[The clock strikes the half-hour.]
O, half the hour is past! 'twill all be past anon.
O, if my soul must suffer for my sin,
Impose some end to my incessant pain;
Let West Ham live in hell a thousand years,
A hundred thousand, and at last be sav'd!
No end is limited to damned souls.
Why wert thou not a creature wanting soul?
Or why is this immortal that thou hast?
O, Pythagoras' metempsychosis, were that true,
This soul should fly from me, and I be chang'd
Into some brutish beast! all beasts are happy,
For, when they die,
Their souls are soon dissolv'd in elements;
But mine must live still to be plagu'd in hell.
Curs'd be the parents that engender'd me!
No, West Ham, curse thyself, curse Lucifer
That hath depriv'd thee of the joys of heaven.
[The clock strikes twelve.]
It strikes, it strikes! Now, body, turn to air,
Or Lucifer will bear thee quick to hell!
O soul, be chang'd into small water-drops,
And fall into the ocean, ne'er be found!

Thunder. Enter Sullivan and Gold.

O, mercy, heaven! look not so fierce on me!
Adders and serpents, let me breathe a while!
Ugly hell, gape not! come not, Lucifer!
I'll burn my books!—O Mephistophilis!

[Exeunt Sullivan and Gold with West Ham]

21 comments:

Dave D said...

If Duxbury is still there, the only thing he may be good for, and that is the tea lady.

But I can see it now:

Brady: "I asked for a coffee not tea, cant you get anything right...YOUR FIRED."

Hammersfan said...

Duxbury would issue her with a press release proving it was coffee!

Anonymous said...

Who cares what you think anyway? As usual, i havent even read what tripe you've written, i just thought id write and let you know what everyone else thinks! You're a mug, you must realise it by now! Why dont you buy some kleenex and do something befitting of your status with your spare time! If you need some help, perhaps you could use some of the 2 David's other products?

Dave D said...

22:24 if you dont like this blog then fuck off & go play with the traffic you wanker.

Or judging by your need to "right in" I am sure you are writing a letter of complaint the the daily mail.

What a prick.

Hammersfan said...

That's an interesting idea 2224. As usual, you feel the need to return and lack the wit to engage. Who cares what you think exactly? Keep the tissues for yourself my friend, I think you are more in need of them!

T.I.S said...

Does anybody know about sullivans external outcome, I mean i assume he's still involved in porn, but surely that wouldn't provide enough income alone to support us?

Anonymous said...

'a few rules'? 'no obscence language'? So wanker & prick are ok? Guess so seeing you & your muggy mates are both! As for Dave D! Did you mean 'write in'? Haha! Why dont you both crack on wanking each other off you mugs!

Anonymous said...

22.24 - If you don't even read the articles anymore, then why are you bothering to comment? Haven't you got bored of repeating your same old shite on avery article? I know the rest of us have.

If you don't like the blog, then quite simply DON'T KEEP COME BACK!

F**king tit.

Anonymous said...

Sheer class! Just typical of this blog! The sooner you stop, the better for everyone connected to West Ham! Why you feel the need to continue with it is beyond belief! I hope everyone who's as disgusted with you as i am refrains from even looking at your blog again! Have the sad, bitter life you deserve! Mug.

Anonymous said...

did not read - just wanted to say that you are by far the crapiest blog

Deane said...

with a bit of luck the people? who think the blog is shit will not only stop reading it but also posting pointless drivel on it
You fortunately have the choice of not visting a site you don't enjoy I unfortuately have to wade through your pointless drivel because I enjoy the blog

Anonymous said...

another pile of crap on this blog.
I'm another one who shant bother with it anymore. There are some good West Ham blogs and some bad ones, this ine is by far the most idiotic and juvenille. If you want to read about West Ham try one of the others, Bubbleview and Hammered are both good, whilst West Ham Till I die and claret & Blue In My Blood have some excellent writing at times. Hammers in the heart like this blog may be a bit self indulgent but its far better than this garbage

Kareem said...

If only the National Bank of Kuwait could own West Ham...

Anonymous said...

Deane 23:38 "with a bit of luck the people? who think the blog is shit will not only stop reading it but also posting pointless drivel on it"

That's the whole point, shit sticks to the most crappiest of blankets

Anonymous said...

Kwevin in manchester writes..

why is it that people are so rude on blogs? it's just opinion, no one died or got hurt. This is the quirkiest and most unpredictable of all west ham blogs and better for it. I had expected furious posting all day yesterday typical and gratifying that you should desist and then hit us with some Faustus..well done. Bye the Bye 'Just Like My Dreams' has re appeared (I like it) with a nugget that'll make your blood boil Hammersfan..apparently Duxbury is on a golden handcuff contract .. getting rid could cost as much as £2 mill in compensation- not good. For the rest, I think the davids are the best choice from teh options available; they understand the football landscape here and have experience in both the PL and the Championship- could be important! However, one quibble, i must say i am tired of the pornographers label being brought out to beat them it's a bit of cliche and a lazy cudgel -there's hardly a corporaton in the world that does not use sex or make money from sex..hotels, phone companies, pay Tv, newspapers, dvd manufacturers, packaging companies,retail ..keep up the good work and f*** the philistines

Hotshot C said...

Duxburry has managed to sign a contract where it would cost more to get rid of h than let him stay...

That man with the eyebrows would continue doing more damage, than a mob of millwall fans with rocket launchers in green St....

He allowed eggie to waste all the money, was involved with tevez affair -and generally used the club as a cash cow (he earns half a million a year!)

Fonzie's Bald Patch said...

HF, a question if I may...
What exactly would it take for you to write something remotely positive and get behind the club you claim to love?
The new regime hasn't been in 48 hours and you have penned two articles, one where you assume the role of one of them calling the club a crap motor and the second one where they are in league with the dark minions.

Tony Fernandes never had the money and would have borrowed against the club, Intermarket were last seen looking for change down Tony Cottee's old sofa - perhaps you favoured the Italian who got through 14 managers in 18 years, raised Calgari to an astounding level of mediocrity and wanted Zola out...?

Maybe I'm missing the subtle humour here or maybe I'm bored of the relentless negativity and lazy attacks, yes they made money in porn, some of the Birmingham fans didn't like them, money doesn't buy class.... ZZzzzzzz
Maybe I should set up an electric shock system on my computer that would stop me from every visiting again and spare myself the frustration at reading some of your opinions...

Or maybe I'll log back on here in time for the next match and find out you haven't attacked the team, the manager, the tactics, the board, the fans, someone on the Org, claimed to be a prophet etc...

Somehow I doubt it.

Hammersfan said...

"It has to be good news in the short term but into the future? Why does the name Faustus come to mind?"

Fonzie, I guess it is a reaction to the blind optimism of the faithful. A week ago, nobody, or hardly anybody, wanted G&S. In fact, polls on other blogs identified either Fernandes or Intermarket as the preferred options. I always thought Intermarket were non runners, and said so on here, and thought Fernandes whimmish approach was odd, which I again stated on here. As I say in the quote above, I regard the take over as good news in the short term but I'm not jumping through hoops at the prospect of their ownership for all the reasons that 98% of our fans DIDN'T want them until they actually became owners. Now, everybody wants to fall into line and three monkeys style, admit to seeing, hearing and speaking no evil out of blind, deaf and dumb loyalty to the cause. The debts are massive, G&S are not philanthropists and they are already talking about selling the ground WITHOUT buying or building a replacement stadium. If we take a 30 year LEASE on the Olympic stadium, what happens when that lease runs out? Tenants at the new Tottenham stadium?

Stani Army said...

I think you're right on that last point HF. I think the most worrying thing for us fans is the fact that Sullivan has first option on the remaining 50%.

I do hope Straummur hold onto that and eventually sell it with the best interests of the club at heart. I also hope Sullivan does not raise the funds to buy it himself in those 4 years.

Will be interesting to see how Fernandes moves now.

fred149 said...

bubblehammers.blogspot.com

Hammersfan said...

Fred, your site is crap! You don't even know how to use capital letters and full stops! Are you still in school? If so, try to pay more attention in your English lessons. You might also like to proof read and correct your dreadful typos.

I have never seen such an amatuer football blog before, and believe me, there are some crap ones out there. Give it up mate. News Now will never give you a platform - they have certain standards. You are talking to yourself.

PS Introduce a hit counter so you can see just how few people are visiting! No wonder you keep trying to bounce traffic from here!