Apoplectic because confidential information was shared on a blog, Neil Warnock has sworn revenge by recruiting a team of trolls to attack the sites of any bloggers he takes issue with. Explaining the placing of adverts for "Angry Trolls" Warnock said: "Christmas dwarfs need not apply. I realise that, because of the Tory fuelled double dip recession, work will be thin on the ground for those little chappies this winter, but they are far too kind hearted to meet my needs."
He continued: "Dwarfs are no good to me whatsoever and will be thrown out of the window should they turn up at interview. I am looking for real trolls, mean little bastards who know how to mix it, a team of mini Joey Bartons who can put the boot into the shins of these bloggers and headbut them in the bollocks."
He added: "I've already recruited a few and they are targeting certain sites as we speak. There's one twat who supports West Ham who seems to revel in attacking me personally at every opportunity. I've got that shit's number and my nasty little bastards are planning to give him a right going over!"
Asked exactly what he is looking for, Warnock replied, "The ideal candidates will be short, ugly and as petulant as hell." Mr Warnock's reply to the suggestion that Carlos Tevez would appear to fit the bill perfectly was, I am afraid to say, unpublishable. When the tirade subsided about how Tevez cost him his job at Shafting United, however, Warnock added, "My trolls need to be exactly like my players. They don't need to be particularly talented but they have to be hungry to get stuck in and they must possess a very nasty streak indeed with no sense of humour whatsoever. I plan on calling them my GRRRRs." Warnock cut short the interview when davefking arrived applying for the job.
This site, of course, expects the usual attack of GRRRR trolls as soon as this report features on the News Now boards!
14 comments:
3/10. Yr slipping sunshine, neither clever, funny or informative!! Can't even be arsed to get the hump with this waffle......shame on u...must try harder!!!
Yawn!
Two trolls already! And they don't understand the irony of posting! Stupid trolls!
I am a qpr fan and I actually find your posts rather amusing. it is good that you pay an interest in us. everything you write is put in a joking way. hoping we stay up of course and that you go up the banter can continue. west ham is an easy away venue to get to and we might have a chance of getting points off you. good luck for the rest of the season.
LOL you won't get a job from Warnock writing like that mate! But cheers!
Warnock was simply trying to deflect attention away from the fact that we still haven’t won a gnome game this season.
But I seriously doubt that even Sullivan the Slimey’s chief orc Bigsam, wielding the Gold Hammer (well, dwarf throwing does seem to be a popular sport these days) in front of the Iron Army of the East, could stop the Road of Loftus.
After all, it is known that attempting to invade the Western Bush of Shepherds can be bad for your elf.
Ok,you have made your point that you hate Warnock/QPR, so as your a West ham site can you tell me where i can find the post about you losing out on the OLYMPIC STADIUM also anything on Leyton Orient trying to get it? How about the fact that if West Ham do not get promoted this season they will be in FINACIAL MELTDOWN??
Look in the blog archive mate, most of it covered there.
that troll looks like one your owners,how ironic. So were are the positive posts about QPR? Maybe about the new training ground? Dont you ever write a positive post about QPR? your pathetic and your becoming more of a joke every time. What goes round comes round.Your west Ham are hiding the fact they are heavily in debt.I cant wait to see a post about that,But im sure you have more important things to write about .maybe QPR
LOL more stupid trolls that don't get the irony of posting!
Not you Ranger!
SCOT(hammersfan), you really need to find something to do with your life, When were still in the Premier League next season and your West Ham are counting the pennies in the Championship we will see the Irony then.
Well how interesting what does SAV have to say then Noble didnt play and we played terrible
Noble did play, Fred! As soon as he came on, our chance of getting anything diminished.
Im sorry stani but i do beleive our best chance of the game came from a noble cross that was flicked on to the post by there player and a noble free kick just tipped over and until he came on we were playing lump the ball to carew and all our best chances were started by noble and why because he can pass the ball to people on the floor
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