Oh dear God, we were promised a mystery Brazilian and ended up with a big fat Egyptian! We thought Tristan was immobile, just wait for when Mido wobbles his way on to the pitch! Long ball forward for the striker to chase, cue the Bangles classic, "Walk like an Egyptian"! Put Diamanti one side of him and Boa-Morte on the other and we can all sing, "Clown to the left of me, Joker to the right, Here I am, stuck in the Mido with you"!
Surely this is the definition of desperation? Sullivan said he was popping out for a kebab and came back with the guy serving in the restaurant - or the bloody meat roll off the spike! The only thing hot about this new signing is the chili sauce smeared all over the fatty carcass! I can picture Zola's face when he saw the latest recruit!
"Is it a pig? Is it a hippopotamus?"
"No Gianfranco, it's our new star striker!"
The guy didn't even make it into the Egyptian national team for pity's sake and isn't good enough for Miserableborough. He has been playing in Egypt - ideal preparation for the Premiership in the middle of winter!
We have him for four months - and if he trains hard he might just get down to twenty stone by the time he departs! God help us!
25 comments:
Well, we still are signing the brazilian (Ilan)
But goodness me! Stop whinging, it could be a far lot worse! Trust me!
Shoe shoe shoe bomber
This is a message for whoever the fuck writes these shit blogs. You do not represent 99.99% of our fans and you chat total shite. An awful website you are no hammers fan
Is the truth hurting 1834 or are you jumping through hoops at signing an overweight Tottenham reject?
Mido and Benni, My Ajax pals are pissing themselves. One of them summed it up for me nicely 'If both of them can keep their gobs shut they will score goals for you, the problem is they don't know how to'
Just in case you don't already know both players came from Ajax youth and both were sold because they were trouble.
He's looking slim HF. Give him a chance. He's got a lot to prove so I think he'll be trying. It's only to the end of the season so we won't be stuck with him should he not perform.
Dale's saying he's only on a grand a week.
you twat are you never f*****g happy with anything. Do you actually go and support the boys or sit on your sad arse writing absolute bollocks
Give the guy a chance, he didn't look fat at all to me, just very tall.
He's playing for Al Zamalek, which is one of the top two teams (first is Al Ahly). He's nowhere near his best, but hey, his experience and the fact that he actually plays regularly will be much more helpful than Sears running around. If anything, he'll wanna prove himself that he can play in the Prem again.
What's the problem with those other comments? Why are people such idiots. Fanno can say whatever he wants. It's his opinion!
lol this reminds me, where on earth do these signings leave Sears, could've left him at Palace at this rate.
I agree about Sears! At the same time, he barely played for them...I think it's best he just re-coordinates himself in the reserves..maybe he'll come out like Stanislas in the spring time! :P I'll have to say the same about Nouble.
Mido could do okay for us..but really, if we signed "Gedo"...top scorer of the African Cup of Nations as a super-sub? That's who we need! Ah well, good luck Mido in the Claret and Blue
A bit surprised by the signings today.
McCarthy was expected and I would guess he will be first choice to play alongside Cole.
Mido looked fighting fit and up for the challenge on SSN, so the criticism about his weight looks to be out of order. Whether he can play football is another matter. The Boro fans are having a laugh at our expense tonight.
Ilan, (Elan) No idea about him but I would have preferred the Bentley to the Lotus.
Did we really need 3 more strikers, or is it a case of buying extra lottery tickets to increase the chance of winning? Worse still Tony Gale has suggested we might be preparing for life without Carlton Cole next year.
Oh well. Zola should have at least 4 strikers to choose from for the Burnley game. Wonder which one he will go with?
"Ilan, (Elan) No idea about him but I would have preferred the Bentley to the Lotus."
Very good Anonymous!!!
2115, I had that worry about Cole and also have a suspicion he may still be feeling that injury. He looked restricted against Blackburn to me. Are we worried he might be out for another extended stint perhaps? I bloody hope not!
According to Big Fat Sam, Benni likes his pies as well. Come on you rolypoly's!
LOL Noble's introducing him to pie and mash as we speak.
If you get Mido version 1.1 then you'll be content for the first few games, he'll the fade away. Depends on his motivation. Can be a right handful but if he can't be arsed he's a terrible waste of space.
Has talent. Just never uses it.
21.47 Yes, and it will be fizzy pop next year
Look I usual support your comments on this site but this is ridiculous, did you even watch ssn before writing this? You can see the difference in mido's fitness he's lost all that weight whereas mccarthy has a long way to go to being fit and everyones jumping for joy about having him sign. I will remain optomistic about all 3 strikers. Mido looks fit and if he can turn on the talent - great. Mccarthy looks seriously overweight but if he trains well then I would be happy if he chipped in with a few goals cos that's all we can expect - he is past his best. I don't know anything about ilan but I'll just be pleased if he can adapt well to the pace of this league. Bottom line - we needed strikers and no one of serious quality was going to come to us so we have to be happy with who we got, support them and support the team.
Mate, I hope Mido proves me wrong. he was a huge lump the last time I saw him, when he scored against us by drilling a free kick beneath our jumping wall!
Hammersfan after reading a few of your blogs i have come to the conclusion that you are a complete and utter muppet!! I dont think you understand the fact that we are NOT rich and the signings we make are to help stay in the league. I would like to further add that you actually make me physically sick to my stomach. Get a job, and then maybe you could afford a ticket to actually watch west ham! x
11.52 I have a job which is why I'm not on here at 11.52 AM. Perhaps you should DO your job!
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