Useless Tosser

So, award for the most pointless thing in the world? Top suggestions: a wife for Prince Edward; a left shoe for Heather Mills McCartney; a mirror for Ian Dowie; a trampoline for Stephen Hawking.

But none of those come close to a British tennis player who can't get fit for Wimbledon! It's only two weeks in the year for pity's sake - or one week if we stay true to form! What is it that's keeping Never Hurry A Murray out? A wrist injury! Perhaps he should stop tossing his caber!