When the team went clay pigeon shooting and go kart racing as a team bonding exercise, Queen Karren complained it was because the management couldn't find anywhere sunny, writing in The Sun (ironically), "Our plan to send the players on a warm-weather break collapsed because the management couldn't find anywhere warm."
Well, wouldn't you know it, Avram has taken the squad to Portugal and it is pissing it down! Brady will be sniggering all the way through her weekly waxing!
I've been to Portugal in late February and it was cold and hacked it down all week. Might I suggest to Avram that he considers the Canary Islands next time!
18 comments:
Oh, don't forget Cyprus! They may get a little jet lagged but the sun is a sure thing.
True but they might party too much in Cyprus!
hows about shagalouf that will get team morale even higher
I suppose Grant wouldn't have conmsiered Israel.
It's cold in Israel in the winter. That's why the shepherds wouldn't have been tending their flocks in December! Jesus was born in September but that doesn't fit in with school holidays!
Don't wanna go there, they might use their passports for something else.
How do you know it was September HF? (Genuinely interested)
Lambing season and Halley's Comet passed over Palestine in September 2 or 3 years before Jesus's estimated birth date.
:)
Canary Islands?! oh dear your class or should I say the lack of it, is shining through - can imagine you with your egg and chips and a copy of current bun!
Well Mr Fan, I don’t know where you got that picture of me and my sisters but Ms Bossyboots Brady is going to be dead narked when she finds out I’m here in Portugal.
You’d think a woman like her would understand that the manager of a top football club like West Ham Athletic needs his own personal masseuse when the pressure gets too much. Sometimes, if a man's going to relax properly he needs a helping hand, if you get my drift.
Believe me, I’m no amateur. I may not have been with the club long (it was my old Gran who recommended me for this job) but, make no mistake, it was me who put the smile back on Mr Grunt’s face.
And do I get any thanks? Well, no I don’t, seeing as you asked.
Still, you don’t want to hear my problems. Anyway, I’m needed in the treatment room. Mr Grunt thinks he may have pulled something and he needs my expert opinion about how best to deal with it. I’m sure it will feel better when I’ve given it a little rub.
So I can’t stop. But I’d be grateful if you could do something about that photo before Ms BB sees it. Maybe you could draw a moustache on one of us and say it’s a bunch of feminists on a protest march; she wouldn’t recognise one of them if they sat on her boat race.
Arsenal out of the Champions League which means no quarter final for them on the 5-6th of April or 2nd leg on the 12th-13th. This means a full strength Gooners team for Blackpool on the 10th. Good for us!
Now we need Harry to lose tomorrow so they can concentrate on the league too. They are still to play all of our relegation rivals.
Well Delores, if you are the one on the right, I'd love to book a visit!
1936, it depends which one you go to and where. Your lack of class shows actually. Try the north of Tenerife for example, or off the beaten track in Feurteventura.
Might I suggest that Brady stick her stupid column where the sun don't shine.
Spam?...or maybe you just don't like me? Na, must be spam.
Erm Stani, we play Tottenham next! Let's keep them in the Champions League for one more round eh?
Ok, I'll see what I can do.
He says there are no Champions League games for Spurs around the time we play them anyway HF so it wouldn't make a difference against us if they went out or stayed in tomorrow.
It'd make a hell of a difference to my fantasy team through, having Rafa and Bale back, so I told him to make the lose.
Delores? I'm afraid your knicker elastic is showing. Your name is spelt DOLORES and comes from the word dolor, meaning pain. Well perhaps that's quite apt given the look on Avram's face most of the time!
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