Much Ado About Nothing

Perhaps the Henry transfer will be the spark that will ignite the transfer market. Apart from Parker and Barton and United's big three signings, has anybody actually moved clubs yet? So much speculation, so little action. Are we really in for Wright-Phillips? Who is going to play left back for us next season? Who will partner Ashton up front? Is Tevez coming, going or staying put? What about Nugent? When is Harewood going and to where exactly? Does anybody really want Reo-Choker? When is Bent's appointment for his circumcision?

Some of the money being talked is absurd. That fantastic tournament, the Inter Toto Cup has kicked off and the squads are almost all the same as on the last day of the season. Come on! Let's see the cheque books, it's all getting a bit boring!

All actions and reactions are equal but some actions and reactions are more equal than others!

Is it any wonder kids are struggling with Maths? Einstein is busily rewriting Relativity Theory in the light of current transfer values. Henry, the best player on the face of this earth, is sold for £16m; Darren Bent, nearly an England man, is on his way for the same fee!

The Game's Gone Crazy? You bet it has! In the light of Bent's fee, the £9m we have to pay to play Tevez (even though he's apparently our own player!) seems like great value!