Monday 5 August 2013

Why is Remy on his way to Newcastle?


So what the hell is going on? Why are we letting Loic Remy join the French Foreign Legion in Newcastle rather than snapping him up for the bargain £2m that the Barcodes are rumoured to paying for his services for a season long loan?

Once again, we are playing brinkmanship as the new season approaches. We all know we need a striker, we don’t need Sullivan Junior to tell us that, and we aint going to get one for less than £2m.

True, Remy’s wages will set Newcastle back a small fortune, but he looks to be well worth the money, providing he can keep his hands off the Geordie lasses.

There’s only one deal that will make this bearable and that’s if Big Chief Demba Ba returns following Chelsea’s capture of Shrek.

We are supposedly targeting a top ten finish, but with Carroll as our only out and out striker, that seems very, very ambitious. We need a striker and we need him fast. Remy would have been perfect. Ba would be good. We don’t want another Chamakh!

But even Jack the Twitter knows that!

39 comments:

Anonymous said...

Probably because any player worth his salt would pick the 'barcodes' over west ham, although he did pick qpr

Anonymous said...

Because there are more prisons up there?

Anonymous said...

Obviously the toon is a better proposition for him and i believe he regrets never choosing them in the first place. To be honest tho if a top London club did come in for him we might of had a battle on our hands but thats not the case and hopefully in the next few hours something will be announced. Good luck to the hammers tho, good club with good history.

Unknown said...

LOL!!!!!! .... LikeDemba would join your below standard lot for a second time ha ha ha ha !!! ha ha ha ha

Anonymous said...

That will because us barcodes are better than u hammers ha ha .
West ham is my child hood team .
My second team
julian dicks Legend

Anonymous said...

Fat Sam the man with no plan!!!

Anonymous said...

Because I bet he didn't fancy playing target practice with Andy Carroll. Or he didn't want to play head tennis. Or he didn't want to have to listen to fans sing about bubbles.

Anonymous said...

Because he wants to play in front of passionate fans in a worlds class stadium , not a stadium that's as old fashioned as the Queen Vic in Eastenders. Gotta remember West Ham is a retirement club for all the has beans & failures that the premiership throws up

fred149 said...

HF your back. Where you been these last 2 months.

Anonymous said...

Come on fellow Toon lads be respectful. Lets all relax and wait for confirmation from the club on this matter.

Anonymous said...

Perhaps Newcastle dont mind taking the risk that he may be in prison from September onwards.

hammertime said...

ooops and there was newcastle just escaped relagation may be he likes relegated clubs ha ha ha ha....oh and carroll turned you down to play in a world class stadium ...the olympic...xxx

Anonymous said...

The scum of the internet eh? Cant you a conversation without resulting to this talk? Your morons, total morons!
West Ham have been doing well of late but they will never ever be a top 6 team again unless they get billionaire owners. Same as everyone else for that manner.
However Newcastle ARE a more prestigious team and theres more chance of anyone hearing of Newcastle then there is of them hearing about West Ham

Anonymous said...

he hasnt signed yet and thats from a toon season ticket holder,he may only play a few games and be facing a rape trial!!
Fellow toon fans should button their lip and show a little respect until Remy has the shirt on at the very least.

Anonymous said...

Newcastle is a piss hole London is the place to be x2 strikers coming in to westham 100 % big things happening at westham keep your French light weight rapist

Anonymous said...

The problem with west ham is bein such a small shity club higher profile plyrs are not atracted to them, only has beens or plyrs that nobody else wants, shame cos not a bad fan base... Like leeds for example!! Lmao xx

spyinthesky said...

Can't believe the the Geordies are still so delusional after all these years of failure and decline. We are on the way up (blips accepted no doubt) you lot are at best on a shelf half way up the wall that you can only fall off of eventually. Thankfully my great grandparents saw that decline in the whole area early and moved south, mind you I do feel sorry that so many of you who stayed put can't even afford shirts. Now thats sad.

Anonymous said...

Newcastle is a pisshole? 10 miles one way we have a unreal coast line (beaches and sea instead if blicks of council houses filled with the scum of the earth) and 10 miles the other we have northumberland and greenery (grass isnt only on a foitball pitch). Typical london narrow minded tit hu thinks london is the center of the world and that up north is as far away is australia. You keep your multiculteral, over crowded, over priced, loud, way to busy, smoggy blocks of council flats with a pathetic gang culture, only the toon will do for me blaaad braap braap

Anonymous said...

West Ham dont want him because he is a suspected rapist , useless, turned them down before and wants to join a team where the rest of the squad are as thick as he is . Pardews pratts are going down and Hammers are climbing the table

Anonymous said...

Geordies delusional? We have been in europe an the champions league in recent history, finished second in the prem league and been in numerous cup finals. What are we delusional about? Wanting an owner to match the size of the stadiun, the amount and passion of the fans, to reach the potential of the club. Stick to being millwalls smaller brother they have been in europe recently, have you????

Anonymous said...

The only club in london that are on there way up is spurs chel & ars already up there, the toon are a far bigger club in every aspect ie stadium, plyrs, fans, value ect ect... All newcastle fans will be imbarrased that hammer fans even hav there name in there dirty poor toothless mouths. And as 4 shirt sales im pretty sure they would more than tripple the hammers, gd luk 4the season tho with that 'strong' squad ;-)

Anonymous said...

Please dont compare newcastle with its beautiful cost line 10 miles one way and northumberland and its greenery 10 mile the other. Londeners are delusional as they think its the center if the world. The argument on who is stupid and delusional is who pays quater of a million pounds to live in an over crouded shoe box in a council block. Stick with your london haha

Toonheed said...

Methinks it's the poor little hammers who are deluded. One season of mid table obscurity and suddenly they are worldbeaters! Carroll held off signing for you for as long as he dared in the hope that the toon would come in for him, but we would never be stupid enough to pay what you did for an injury prone 10 a season striker. Without a Europa league induced injury crisis we will be back up there this season. Krul, Debuchy, Santon, Coloccini, Yanga-Mbiwa, Tiote, Cabaye, Sissoko,Ben arfa, Cisse, Remy looks pretty tasty to me with Gomis possibly on his way too. As for Stab City, you can keep it, most of you will never be able to even afford a garage down there. It's grim up north, you lot keep believing that ;-)

Anonymous said...

Because geordie girls never say no

Anonymous said...

You Newcastle fans make me piss i'am a manchester utd fan I lived in Newcastle for work and I can assure you Newcastle is not on the same plant has London once westham move in to there new stadium you will be living in there shadow as well as how's you are a very poor side with piss poor manger westham is a solid English based side look at toon heads line up how many English man in that disgrace to English football

Anonymous said...

Remy the rapist and pardew likes to shag around. What could possibly go wrong for the Geordies. Coyi

Anonymous said...

I think it is probably his wages that have scuppered it. Having put all your striker eggs into one basket (Carrol on a 6 year contract at 100k a week)I think you'll be looking for a cheaper option. It's interesting to read what you say though as this is a repeat of how we have been feeling at the toon as we have also been operating with only 1 striker (Cisse)and have been clamouring for reinforcements. I'm hoping we get another 1 in as I do feel you need 3 decent strikers to make any impact. Good luck though and hope you get somebody good in - hopefully though we can manage to finish above you this coming season. Can't wait for the start.

Anonymous said...

Cant believe all this rubbish . West Ham are at least as good as Newcaastle,but we have the bigger and better potential which has been reinforced by one of your own "carroll" So all the childish abuse the geordies are giving us is obviously based on jealously. Nolan and now Carroll.

And to the muppet who said no one has heard of WHU, if any football fan has not heard of WHU then theirs & your knowledge of the game is minimal therefore your comment is just as small.
ps and we done u on yr own turf ....foolian

Anonymous said...

That's very poor grammar, do you not have schools in London? (I'm presuming London as you say you're a man utd fan) To busy selling drugs and stabbing each other I would imagine.

Anonymous said...

All these insults and ongoing back and forth feeble attempts at one upmanship; and not a comment about Mike Ashley or Joe Kinnear...

Lots of columns to be read and tv reports to come from this twisted and dysfunctional management to come in the next few months I fear. Speckled with some gibberish and innapropiate and offensive hilarity from Kinnear...

I can't wait.

Anonymous said...

Because he wouldn't have to rape any of the Geordie gals. They would all be offering whatever he wanted on a plate. Slags

Anonymous said...

"That's very poor grammar, do you not have schools in London? (I'm presuming London as you say you're a man utd fan) To busy selling drugs and stabbing each other I would imagine."

I can spot at least 3 grammatical errors/spelling mistakes in your comment. A little hypocritical, wouldn't you say?

lewis said...

Do they even have schools in Newcastle, I have refrained myself this long but this comment was one to many, the grammar of you lot is appalling, yes we have been in Europe recently albeit didn't get to far, Palermo, a year after your terrible away attendance there guess what, little crap West ham with their shit fans sold out, all this crap about how small we are sounds like you lot remembering about 10 years ago when you were challenging for top 4 and calling spurs, Everton and Liverpool but now resulting in calling West ham small, oh how the mighty have fallen

Anonymous said...

West Ham didn't want to sign a player who may be guilty of a sexual crime and who could be going to prison, it's very simple.

Revolver said...

Without getting into a discussion about the relative merits of West Ham and Newcastle, there are probably two reasons why Remy isn’t joining us.

Firstly, as Anonymous 10:39 said, we’re not interested in a player who may end up behind bars.

Secondly, no player worth their salt will join us to play second fiddle to Carroll. Sullivan has already said that the reason Bony didn’t join was because he wanted to play in the middle and Allardyce will only be playing one player in that position – Carroll. Whoever joins will be out wide either in a 4-5-1 or a 4-3-3.

We are suffering because Allardyce will not change. If we don’t manage to sign anybody it will be interesting to see who is up front for the first few games of the season as Carroll is injured. It will probably be Maiga and how many goals can we expect from him?!

Hammersfan said...

But Remy can play out wide!

Anonymous said...

Haha, I see a guy write Julian Dicks, legend. That made me think of that TV commentator:

"Julian Dicks is everywhere today, it's like they have 11 Dicks on the pitch"

Anonymous said...

newcastle have paid £5,300,000 for 9 months for remy lol,he went to qpr for the money now there paying him the same

Revolver said...

Yes, HF, Remy can play out wide but my guess is he would sooner be in the middle scoring goals as opposed to supplying crosses for someone else.

In any event, like Carroll, he's injured and will miss the start of the season.