So, Allardyce is in "advanced talks" with an unnamed striker and is trying to thrash out a deal with the player's agent and his club. Great. The trouble is, it's three months too bloody late!
According to Allardyce, owner David Sullivan is "the quickest owner of a football club I have ever had. He doesn't 'ooh', 'aah' and 'um' like most of the other owners I have been involved with"; which is a bit rich given an elephant has a shorter gestation period than it has taken the club to realise that Carroll is crocked and Mogadon Maiga is about as useful on the pitch as a square football.
The BIG question is, what has suddenly happened to the Financial Fair Play penalties that Sullivan cited as his reason for sitting on his wallet in July and August? How bloody foolish were the mugs who, when I called him out on this blog, leapt to his defence! According to the Hear No Evil, Speak No Evil, See No Evil Claret & Blue Klan, I had no idea what I was talking about. Our hands were tied, there was nothing we could do. Just as Uncle David told us!
Well since then we have added Cole and Petric to the squad, and now, half way through the season, we are about to add another striker - who presumably won't be coming cheap!
In fact, we are now over the proverbial barrel with our trousers and pants around our ankles. Club, agent and player will know we are desperate, so here comes another Benni McCarthy or Demba Ba deal - either the player will be on hugely inflated wages and crap into the bargain, or he will have an absurd release clause written into his contract.
And why has this happened? Because Sullivan and Gold spoilt the ship for a hap'orth of tar, hiding behind the excuse of FFP to save a few million quid. And how that has exploded in their faces!
Financial Fair Play penalties? Don't make me bloody laugh. They don't cut in for three transfer windows and everybody with his head out of his arse knows that Sullivan took the club's fans for mugs when he used this absurd excuse even as QPR went deeper and deeper into debt.
Well, as Benjamin cried when Boxer was carted off from Animal Farm, "Fools! Fools! Can't you see what's written on the side of that van? Sullivan & Gold, pedlars of lies! Can't you see? They're taking West Ham to the knackers!"