Wednesday 4 March 2009

Wigan 0 West Ham 1; Reason 0 Attwell 5

If ever a referee did his best to destroy a game of football then it must surely be Attwell last night. This is the clown who gave the "goal that never was" when Watford played Reading; and for his follow up party piece, he showed a red for "a foul that never was" at the JJB last night. Poor Carlton Goals, he was dumbfounded that the referee had blown up for a free kick in the first place and before he knew what was going on, he was looking at red. And for what exactly? From what I could see, for keeping his eye on the ball and then getting his foot on the end of it. That foot which made contact with the ball did not connect with a Wigan player and no actual foul was committed. Yes I can accept the argument for a free kick for a high foot, but a red card? Dear God, on that basis Crouch should have been sent off for those overhead bicycle kick goals! I bet this guy is only a referee in his twenties because when he was a kid, nobody would pick him to play in the teams at lunchtime. He was the one left at the end of the selection process, fat and spotty, waiting for oft repeated words, "You're left with Attwell then. We have kick off". From what I have seen. he doesn't understand the first thing about football because he's never actually played the game. On the evidence of the Watford debacle, he doesn't even know that the round shaped thing has to go into one of the funny fishing nets for a goal to be awarded!

And what a shame because until Attwell's risible intervention, this was shaping up to be a cracker! What a goal! Yes you will see goals thumped in from long distance but this, for me, was the goal of the season. Six one touch pinged passes, Cole pulling off the shoulder of the last defender and curling in a beaut of a finish. Carlton has his critics, and sometimes he does look lumbering, like when through one on one with Kirkland, but some of his goals this season have been sublime - against Newcastle and Stoke in particular. This swivel and strike style of finish suits him perfectly, he gets a lovely bend on the shot as it curls into the net. In fact, the finish tonight was Zolaesque and there aren't many bigger compliments than that! How absurd that his glory was tarnished by Attwell's bid for the spotlight.

And it's not as if that was all the clown with the cards got wrong. Luckless SHOULD have gone. His foul on Cattermole was a would be leg breaker and, of course, set up the Wigan player's retaliation on Parker which rightfully led to his red. As soon as Neill did him, you knew there would be a reprisal, and Parker played his part to perfection, going down as if hit by a dumdum bullet and rolling in agony for maximum effect. Ten out of ten Scotty for sealing the decision!

Beyond that, there's not a lot to report. Defensively we were superb, the banks of four marshaling Wigan into blind alleys all evening. Tomkins got under a couple of crosses but, apart from that, was superb; Neill gave away possession in the centre circle and two unnecessary free kicks outside our box in the first fifteen minutes but was otherwise disciplined - except when apparently trying to break Cattermole's leg (Brown should have been the target Luckless!); Upson was his usual unfussy self; Ilunga was back to his best; Noble ran his heart out and twice nearly pinched a goal; Kovac has a problem when players run at him but was otherwise impressive, picking up bits and pieces in front of the back four and releasing short simple passes; Collison played one brilliant pass to Cole and was involved in so much neat, high speed interpassing; and Di Michele ran himself into the ground for the team. One player, Cole apart, has not been mentioned. Parker tonight was a giant. I have no time for Turds but the signing of both Parker and Upson were absolute masterstrokes. Tonight Parker tackled, covered, passed, drove forward, shot on target and signed the contract on Cattermole's dismissal. It truly was a midfield masterclass and we were so good in that crucial midfield area that Behrami was not missed at all!

Sadly, however, the night will be remembered for two cruel blows - the dismissal of Cole and the carbon copy of the Behrami injury suffered by Collison. I joked when Curbishley was in charge that he had refused to buy a sprig of lucky heather off a gypsy outside Upton Park and brought down a curse upon our club. Well Turds came out this week and bleated that Zola had been lucky with injuries. I bet the sad eyed bastard has been back to that gypsy, bought up the whole of her heath and asked her to extend the curse to Zola!

8 comments:

Anonymous said...

Your usual succinct appraisal of the match squire. Very enjoyable; if not quite up to the standard of the Org. I can see now why they wanted rid of me, it's absolutely rocking on there and some of the humour.......well I just can't match that! Regarding the match: Collins is going to have trouble getting his place back, I said a long time ago that Tomkins would play for England and he will. diMichele deserves a contract for next season, I'm more and more impressed with him. That Carlton Cole's rubbish isn't he? Neale is a liability and if he's not replaced he will one day lose us a big match; far and away the weakest link in the team, he's slow and just can't keep his hands to himself. The one player who I think is getting an easy ride is Kovac. Whilst I can see that there's a good player in there, he's played a lot of poor passes and his tendancy to lunge in is worrying. Perhaps I'm being harsh. Whilst, as you can probably imagine, I can be quite harsh on people, I am harsh on myself too, and this guy looks like me! Or me twenty odd years ago!
So that draws a line under the old Emo "all in black and self harming" image. I'm 6'2", 14 stone, fair and blue eyed ( does that qualify me for a return to the Orgestra? )

el martillo said...

Sorry to appear like one of those brave ICF types and log in as "anon", the previous comment was of course made by me. As I'm talking identities, I'll just leave the answers to my locked, tongue in cheek offering on the Org. 1 - Monte. 2 - Cliff. 3 - Davefking. 4 - Dutch. 5 - Pete. 6 - Fanno. 7 - '66. 8 - Salty. 9 - WestHamWillyTillyDies. 10 - Den. How many did you get? There are quite a few more!
Now, is there anyone brave enough to post those??
Anyway, if don Quixote, the hobbit or the 6'8" skinhead would like to come and play, may I say they are welcome, we may not be allowed to go to your playground, but you're welcome here. In fact anyone is welcome here, well they'd better be Fanno or I'm off!
As we are now both ostracized from the Orgestra and reduced to doing a bit of busking; I thought we might get in touch, I have an old e-mail you once published on the Org. If that's a genuine address, you can expect a message soon!
el martillo

el martillo said...

Christ I,m going to appear a right bore, but I did forget to say, M2C, Inoticed you looked in; if you do so again, thankyou for your post in support of me. I know it wasn't there long, but you and Den are at least brave enough to speak up for free speech, my very best wishes to both of you!

Anonymous said...

Hello Fanno, my appeal for this page to be removed has been ignored, I might have to write to my MP! Good appraisal of the game, only saw MOTD highlights mind. Gutted for Collison, looked a nasty injury. I think Luckless is a terrible nickname for Lucas though - he must be the luckiest player alive! What about his o.g. at Newcastle that he got away with and how many penalties should he have conceded with his 'ABH' style defending in the box? Anyway, its quite ironic that I am actually posting on here as when you first joined 'da org' I persistently attacked you for advertising it! It seems that Neville is adamant that you are El Martillo...well, I hope your not talking to yourself in here. Anyway, keep at it and I'll keep looking in. Denbighammer.

Anonymous said...

Marty I did support you on Org and did genuinely think you were your own man. I was very disappointed when Neville said you and Fanno were the same but do admit to still having my doubts. I have made friends with Dave, Bill and IG and they are all top blokes but there was obviously clashes of personality between you guys. I have argued your case and would love it if you could somehow prove your existence as I enjoyed your contributions to the site. Best wishes to you anyway and I might have the occasional look in to make sure Fanno is behaving himself as I did always enjoy pulling him into line!! Aycliffe

Anonymous said...

Thanks Cliff, I'm not Fanno and Nev knows I'm not, I have been very unfairly treated. Whilst I may have been a bit contentious, a little near the knuckle perhaps, I have rarely been rude to anyone. When I have it has generally been when I have been abused by someone thinking I was Fanno. Even then, as in my spat with IG the other day it ended in a handshake of sorts. Best wishes to you Cliff I enjoyed our banter.
As regards proving my identity, Pete knows I'm not Fanno.

Anonymous said...

I have been discussing this with Wrighty this morning, have a look on WHF Forum. I would be quite happy to post mine and your posts up on it if you want me to. Aycliffe

Anonymous said...

I saw it, and salute you for standing your ground in the face of potential ridicule, you said you thought I was my own man and you've proved that you are. Thankyou for your kind offer but I would not want to jeopardise your involvement in the site in any way. Why don't you contact me on: adudes123@hotmail.com