How appropriate that on yesterday's today, the much lamented today of the great take over, the Official Site made a stunning announcement. Big news breaking! Take off time! All aboard! Who needs Master Bates' Elland Road when you have...
Flamingo Land. Yes folks, it was all quiet on the take over front yet again, but Leeds United were happy to announce a new ride has opened at the local amusement park. Well, with Warnock in charge, you have to find entertainment somewhere don't you?
And how appropriate that the ride is called Pterodactyl - a dinosaur ride for a dinosaur club some might say. An ugly vicious creature that once scaled the heights but which is now - other than in the imagination of some - as extinct as a dodo.
Perched appropriately close to Cliff Hanger - and the fans might hang poor old Cliff for taking the piss should he ever turn up and sing Congratulations - the ride promises to "combine high altitude thrills" with "soaring and swooping" - well guys, what goes up, must come down. Like the Take Over Balloon perhaps?
Join the ride, and you will quickly feel as if you have "truly taken flight as you quickly rise" - well seventh in the Championship is likely to give you a nose bleed if you are a Leeds fan! - before you "circle and circle above the crowds below moving ever further to horizontal"! How appropriate!
A dinosaur ride for a dinosaur club moving in ever more horizontal circles! The "very sight of it" apparently creates "spine tingling fear to rival its prehistoric namesake". Mind you, parallels end there because to term Elland Road "stone age theming" is perhaps overdoing it. Iron Age surely? The natives can use basic tools and have evolved communication in the form of hand gestures and grunting!
Perhaps it is time for a new logo for a new era, a pterodactyl and a flamingo standing guard over the portals of Elland Road, the stone age reality of extinction side by side with the pink fluffy symbol of hope, teetering precariously upon one snap thin leg.
But never mind guys, today is the day for the takeover!
Alton Towers are closing in on Flamingo Land!