Sunday 3 October 2010

David Gold to replace Capello as England Manager!

You have to laugh at our owners. Gold has now come out and announced that Parker should be in the England team. Fair enough, you might say, but do you hear any other club owners or chairmen trying to select the national football team?

How, exactly, is Gold qualified for this role? It is one thing for Avram Grant to express an opinion, but quite another for Gold to chip in with his two dildo worth. I know we do it as fans, and as a blogger I am in a vulnerable position here, but I can't think of any other owners who show such presumption. Can you imagine Daniel Levy making a case for Crouch to be included in the England team, for example?

But Gold, it seems, has a coaching badge and is a master of team tactics. He opines:  "Scotty Parker would bring something to the midfield that England have been lacking for the last couple of years. He's someone who can make goals, who can score goals and he can track back. He has every attribute that most managers dream of. He could slot in to the team easily. The argument has always been that Gerrard and Lampard cannot play together, but I promise you that Gerrard and Scotty Parker can play together. They're made for each other."

Reading this, you begin to wonder why Sullivan and Gold waste money employing a manager and coaching team. Sullivan could give the motivational talks and Gold could select the team and sort out the tactics. Job done. I'm sure Brady could replace the fitness coach too. Twenty minutes of physical jerks with her might even get Kieron Dyer out on the pitch!

It is entertaining stuff, I accept, but the chief reason for this latest piece of pontification is, of course, to curry favour with the fans. It is a little bit awkward that we have slipped back to the bottom of the table so, how better to deflect attention away from that irritating detail than by demanding that super, super Scotty Parker be selected for England? Good old David Gold! Parker for England! The good times are back!

But then, oh shit, would you look at that, we are bottom of the table!

46 comments:

Sav said...

We are only two wins away from 4th position on the table!

Gold has said a lot more outrageous things before and no-one noticed HF (e.g. Riquelme, Ronaldhino, Beckham, etc.).

Sav said...

A piece of advice HF if I may. I think that the main reason comments have decreased substantially lately is because of the big delay it takes for them to be posted on the page. It kills the enthusiasm and the feeling that you are having a live conversation with your peers. It is like communicating from Mars and having to wait about 50 minutes before you get a response from NASA! You are a rocket scientist, I am sure you get what I am talking about. Can't you do anything about that?

Essexhammer said...

I agree SAV,but what choice does HF have when he is often barraged with abuse in the extreme.Sure he has strong views that can generate a similarly strong response but he doesn't deserve some of the language I have read on here.

Hammersfan said...

That's partly it Essex mate but there have been problems with the spam filter. I was recommended by google blogspot to introduce the moderator function due to a splurge of spam that had blown through their firewalls. I am moderating out a good 60 to 70 spam comments that are advertising porn, legal services and the like. Some carry viruses if you inadvertentently follow the links so, in the interests of all readers, I'm playing safe.

Anonymous said...

I actually think he's pretty indefensible. As they say, if you can't take it, you shouldn't dish it out. The man is desperate for attention but can't take the fact that the majority of attention he attracts is negative.

I quickly learnt that this site isn't about debate - the owner regularly deletes comments that prove him wrong or show what an idiot he is. This place is all about one mans fragile ego. He can only survive somewhere where he is on control of both sides of an argument. Weak is the only word,

Anonymous said...

Hammersfan, your comment at 19:34 is an absolute lie.

Hammersfan said...

Hang on, I will see if I can post one of the Spam comments if I have one pending. One moment.

Anonymous said...

No Hammers, that's not the bit you lied about. Google have not sent any recommendations about turning on the moderator regarding spam. If they had, they would have sent it to every blogspot owner and not just you. I also know the very point in time and the reason why you turned the moderator on and it's nothing to do with spam.

Hammersfan said...

Do not follow the links on here. This is a Spam comment illustrating to our paranoid friend what is being sent to the site. I cannot verify that the links will not result in your pc downloading a virus.

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Hammersfan said...

Now, would you like to retract the absolute lie comment 1938?

And, whilst you about it, would you like to confirm which of your comments I have moderated out? I moderate out racism, pornographic comments and obscene abuse, but that it is. Which have you been engaging in?

Anonymous said...

See 19:42. You also deleted 2 of my comments yesterday after you tried to preach about how low anonymous commenters are, unlike you, who's not anonymous at all.

Hammersfan said...

Oh, so I am receiving the spam but that is not what I am lying about. Actually, the message was because the site is getting so many hits. Obviously these guys aren't targeting sites below certain traffic levels. Your wehatethegamesgonecrazy site wasn't getting enough traffic to qualify obviously! This problem occurred for the first time about two months ago now. I contacted google and acted on their advice. Prior to then, the site had no spam section. Now, a percentage of these messages go stright into a dedicated spam folder but, unfortunately, a large number do not not. I will see if I still have the email communications and will forward them to you if you supply an email address. If your site gets popular enough, you may need to take the same action.

So, in your fantasy world, why did I introduce the moderator?

Anonymous said...

Hammers, I don't need to tell you why you turned it on. And what the hell are you talking about my wehate whatever site??! You loon! Oh, spam senders do not, have not and will never target sited that only receive a certain amount of hits or above. You have no idea how these things work so don't make yourself look silly (sillier). And I'm the paranoid one??!!

Anonymous said...

Oh, by the way your 'your fantasy world' comment has to be your best so far. The irony.

Hammersfan said...

You mean that you tried to post two comments under my handle of Hammersfan? I think EVERYBODY else will understand why I did not allow that. Give yourself a handle and I will post your comments. Try to use mine and I will not. God, you must be a moron if you can't understand why that rule is applied. Tell me, why do you hiide behind the anonymous name? Why not set up an account? Because then we could track you back to the wehatethegamesgonecrazy site perhaps? Sad man!

Anonymous said...

Phew, my man, calm down. Nope, whatever site you are referring to has nothing to do with me, i can assure your little mind of that.

Tell me, what makes you so un-anonymous? If I had a 'handle' (as you so camply put it) of 'COYI', for example, would I then be un-anonymous, like you? Please explain, calmly.

Hammersfan said...

1955, don't tell me, tell everyone else. The stage is yours! You are right, I don't know how these things work, that's why I went to google blogspot for advice. I think they do. And they were right as the example of spam above shows. Explain that please. I never used to receive spam like this - check the history! But then, that's all a fantasy world I suppose. Remember when you used to claim that nobody visited the site?

Anonymous said...

Please, Hammers, if you are going to address me, let go of your paranoia and stop the accusations. You are coming across as a little bit mental.

Hammersfan said...

Simples my friend. Then you would be accountable from one comment to another. Stani, for example, can always be challenged on the basis of previous comments. You are a coward. You leave comments thinking that nobody can link to you the next time you make an arse of yourself. So, use a handle - preferably the same one you use on the Org. I am Hammersfanno1, Fanno, lbmisgod and stopatthecurbs; who are you?

Anonymous said...

My dear paranoid little boy, I do not use 'the org' so there are no names to tell you.

You are as anonymous as anyone else on here. 'handle' or not.

Hammersfan said...

LOL You are the mental one mate. You are the one hiding behind anonymity. You are probably the one who set up that ludicrous site that fell flat on its face - and people have visited it so know it existed. You are the one who is making assertions without any eveidence to back them up. I am answering your points with evidence. And you are the one who keeps returning to a site you hate. Why do you do that? Ensnared by the Game.

Anonymous said...

ps incorrect use of a semi-colon there. And they let you teach children?

Anonymous said...

'eveidence '? what 'eveidence' is it you require?

Hammersfan said...

And you are a liar because when trying to use my handle yesterday, you referred to my past on the Org! You trip over your own lies, that's why you are terrified of revealing who you are!

As for the semicolon,

1) Between independent clauses of equal rank when there is not a coordinating conjunction:

Individual environmental action is essential for saving the planet; everyone must take action in his or her community.

http://writing2.richmond.edu/writing/wweb/semicolon.html

Try going back to school mate.

Anonymous said...

Oh...and what assertions is it that I'm making?

Hammersfan said...

None mate, you haven't made any assertions, you are just stringing words together at random, making no points whatsoever!

Anonymous said...

Been to school, got my marks and then went into the big brave world. Unlike you, you never quite made it out there did you?

As for you calling me a liar, it is now you that must make a retraction. Of course you won't though. Can you tell me how knowing that you lived on a site called 'the org' means that I am a member of said establishment, with a 'handle'? Have you not over the years made countless remarks regarding your past on 'the org'? Is 'the org' not an open website where anyone can browse it's entire contents without being a member?

Liar am I?

Anonymous said...

Come on my dear, you can do better than that.

Anonymous said...

Oh, and as for your copy and paste explanation of a semi colon, can you tell me how that relates to 'I am Hammersfanno1, Fanno, lbmisgod and stopatthecurbs; who are you?'

Are you suggesting that they are 'independent clauses of equal rank when there is not a coordinating conjunction'?

Are you?

Anonymous said...

the only time you get more than 3 comments is when you're getting cained!! i love it!!!!!!

Hammersfan said...

LOL Yes liar you are. And as for being out of school, I left when I finished my O Levels and went to college, from there to University and from there, if you have followed my history closely enough, into the bookmaking industry, then into housebuilding, then into the rocket industry - whilst building a portfolio of rented properties along the way.

What's your job? Estate agency? On the bins? Cut and shunt Porsche and dustcart perhaps? Of course, some of you guys think you know differently because our company is partly based in a university research park. What does she say in "Pulp Fiction". "THEY talk a lot don't THEY?" Want a free ticket for the Farnborough Air Show next year? Let me have your email address and I will organise it for you.

Hammersfan said...

Oh and yes they are clauses of equal rank. It is the same as "Sally is fat; Julie is thin". The left hand side of the semicolon identifies my handles; the second half explores yours. The sentence could be rewritten with the coordinating conjunction "but". Like this:

I am Hammersfanno1, Fanno, lbmisgod and stopatthecurbs but who are you?

Understand? Now say thank you for today's lesson. Actually, I AM quite good at this; perhaps I should go back to school! (I could join those two clauses with "so" at the point of the semicolon. See?)

Sav said...

Wow, that really got the debate going! Not sure you're goinf to thank me for it though! Another piece of advice if I may HF? Why don't you try not rising to your detractors on here? It really detracts quality from the site to trawl through the many arguments you have on this site. And 9 times out of 10 you always come off looking the worse. I'm going to dare to say this: why don't you take a leaf out of Dales book? Start the debate with a post and then leave the debate to the users? Dale never appears 'bellow the line' and yet the debate can go on for days amongst his followers. You should try the same as it seems that every time you comment on your own piece it quickly descends into what we see above.

I'll run for cover now!!!!!!!

Hammersfan said...

Because it is fun Sav. Simple.

Hammersfan said...

And Sav, if I didn't moderate, our starting point here, you would have to wade through truly distasteful stuff.

Sav said...

I tried to post a comment before but it did not register!

I wanted to say that I did not make the previous comment (21:15). It was made by an imposter using my name!

I am sorry that my question has started such an avalanche of negative comments.

I should say however, that although I do not always agree with you, I grant you that you do have the courage to speak your mind and that you also tolerate other people's views (despite being very unfair sometimes).

Hammersfan said...

Fair enough Sav. Shows why moderation is necessary and even then it is not fool proof! Shows that the guy is a deceitful liar doesn't it?

Sav said...

HF, I think you have just been caught by a double bluff. I did write the earlier post and am surprised you didn't attack me for it!!

Hammersfan said...

Yawn.

John said...

I think Gold and Sullivan are Genuine West Ham fans and try to communicate with the fans as fans. I agree it doesn't happen elsewhere, but find it quite refreshing.

Dave said...

Fanno, on another one of your posts, when accused of being on the org with multiple usernames you state:

'No I wasn't. That was a myth. People are still trying to spot multiple Fannos on the site. '

Yet in this post you seem to make it very clear that you were on the org with multiple usernames:

'I am Hammersfanno1, Fanno, lbmisgod and stopatthecurbs'

What's that all about? I'm sure you won't publish this so no doubt I'll never get to know. Still, it's interesting to see how your mind works.

Hammersfan said...

Why would I not carry your post Dave, it is a sensible and civil enquiry. The answer is easy. To begin, I registered as Hammersfanno1 on the Org, but this was shortened to Fanno by other posters, the name you have used here. Hammersfanno1 was then suspended from the site and although I was allowed back on, the system would not accept the user name so I had to register as another name, on the advice of Mr Nixon. He actually, from memory, ran a forum explaining to me, and other members, that I had to employ a different handle. The suspension was triggered because I was automatically using a link to this site on my posts and a firewall thought I was a spammer because of the number of posts I made. As I had fallen out big time with westham66 about the "merits" of LBM, who I thought was a yard dog but who 66 thought was a fusion of Pele, Cruyff, Zidane and Maradona, I went with the ironic lbmisgod as my new handle. With me so far? Nothing too sinister, I'm sure you will agree.

stopatthecurbs appeared for two nights as a joke. He asked for help with homework and talked about his Dad's opinions on Brooking, Moore, Devonshire and co. Some posters spotted the joke immediately but others kindly offered homework help and engaged with the stupidly naive stopatthecurbs. The name was again ironic because I was a vociferous opponent of Curbishley's appointment and tactics. Westhamtilidie (Bill) was one of the first to spot the joke and ran with it, delighting in the humour. After two days, the joke was revealed and stopatthecurbs concentrated on his GCSE History homework, never to appear again. He was a spoof and was received as such. Nothing menacing, nothing sinister; but a series of alter egos then appeared as jokes, created by other members, with OSP leading the way. I chipped in with Alan Pardew when somebody registered as Alan Curbishley, but again this was all good fun banter.

Still with me? And that was it until Fanno / lbmisgod was banned. Then a series of handles were registered for a number of weeks to show how easy it was to get round the ban and to extract the urine out of certain character "types" - including a nasty yob from Canvey Island. I then grew bored and signed off from the site.

Or did I? ; ]

Hammersfan said...

Finally, the point is that I never used multiple IDs at the same time. El Martillo was banned because he was supposed to me. He wasn't. Others were accused of being me and signed off from the site because posters turned on them with savage vitriol, accusing them of being Fanno is disguise, when they weren't.

Flappers and others are convinced that Tom Hanks is Fanno. He is not. I think Tom Hanks is a clever guy but he has been unnecessarily savage in his attacks on Flappers. Despite what people say or think, I would NEVER be that vitriolic. I have explained to Flappers why I was angry that he said on the site that we would not accept a low paid job to get off benefits. I still think he was wrong but the criticism was honest and was the result of sincerely held political convictions that I am not ashamed of. I am a socialist and do not want free loaders undermining the welfare state.

Anything else you would like to know?

Sav said...

So if not you who would you guess is Tom Hanks?

Hammersfan said...

Can you please stop using Sav's handle?

I have no idea who he is. The guy HATES Irons Germany and knows a number of the regulars on the Org personally. I have no idea where Aycliffe lives, for example, except it is in Sunderland somewhere - but Tom Hanks knows his first name and the name of the road in which he lives. Nor did I know the German golf course on which Irons Germany works as a club pro; but Tom Hanks did! He also knows about IG's past in some detail.

Tom Hanks makes no secret of his loathing of IG and has marked the thug's card. Good on him for that. I disagree with his attack on Flappers but Flappers has said some pretty awful things about Mr Hanks in the past, including insisting that he is me. What I find strange is why Tom has not been banned. Fanno was nothing on Mr Hanks!

Anonymous said...

Well Mr Hanks is not as clever as he thinks he is as aycliffe hammer seems to have put him away.