West Ham v Fulham. If it aint broken, don't fix it!

It's not often that we have been able to say that since the appointment of Zola. But after last Saturday's stunningly impressive performance against Spurs, why would anybody choose to fiddle with the team?

Dyer is, of course, broken. That was inevitable. He couldn't even make it through a full half last Saturday and has now cried off because he has the runs! Dyer has the runs! He has barely broken into a run for three years so the irony of him not playing because of the runs is so...well so typically West Ham! I'm surprised that Sullivan hasn't opened up an Ann Summers catalogue and shoved a butt plug up Kieron's arse. "There we go son, no backfiring for 90 minutes guaranteed!"

There is a danger here that it will all blow up in our faces today - and that would be more horrible than being the person tasked with removing that plug from Dyer 's arse after the game. Fulham are the only team in the league who regard West Ham as their bogie side, and even Zola managed a point against them at Upton Park last season - albeit Fulham played the whole of the second half with 10 men! Everything points to a West Ham victory; but when everything points to a West Ham victory, we know what happens, don't we?

Dempsey will be firing grubbers at Green all afternoon and God help Robert "Up Yours Journos" if he lets in another dolly! Mark Hughes will also be using his big men to crowd Green at corners, a tactic that the purist 'Arry rejected in the name of "good football". I worry about Johnson if he starts or comes on. There's a year and more of frustration bursting to get out and we do have a habit of rehabilitating opponents after they have had a bad time.

But those are the dark voices talking. That's what happens to you after you have supported West Ham for more than 40 years - you end up looking at a 99 cone and wondering if the flake bar is a dog turd! We should be focused on our strengths today, we should be encouraging the boys to rip Fulham apart in the same way as we carved open Tottenham. We don't have to worry about Zamora or Konchesky. Paintsil can be exploited. Schwartzer has looked even more unsure than Green in recent weeks. We are a better team, player for player, than Fulham. We have a great record against them. We come into the game with confidence surging. We are at home and the crowd will be really up for the game. Surely, surely...

...but this is West Ham!