Friday 22 April 2011

Parker Footballer of the Year? Absurd!

Well the game really has gone crazy! All those journos that hate West Ham and that West Ham fans hate, have contrived to vote Scott Parker Footballer of the Year, giving him the nod over the player's choice, Gareth Bale. Whilst Bale, himself, is a curious choice for the PFA Player of the Year, the selection of Parker is positively perverse!

Where are West Ham in the table? Second from bottom with a very good chance of propping up the entire division come 7 p.m. on Saturday. And yet our "most influential" and "inspirational" player is picking up the gong! On that basis, we should pay out on last past the post in the Grand National and put the last three in a Grand Prix on the podium! How has he "influenced" and "inspired" us exactly? Influenced and inspired us to finish bottom? Brilliant!

Look at his record! How many Prem goals has he scored? Five. Adam has scored 9 in an inferior team. Bale has scored 7 in less games. Cahill of Everton has bagged 9. Malouda has netted 12 and Lampard 7. Nani has 9 . Nasri has 10. Yaya Toure has bagged 5. Gardner has netted 7 for Birmingham. And a certain Kevin Nolan, playing in midfield for newly promoted Newcastle has scored an amazing 12!

But playing in midfield is more about creating chances isn't it? Well Parker has assisted just 3 times in the Prem all season! That means that if all 11 players contributed in the same way, including the centre backs and keeper - who have other duties - then the maximum goals for column would read just 33 from 30 games (the number Parker has played in)! In fact we have scored 39 in 33, showing that, statistically, Parker isn't even OUR most influential player!

Compare Parker's 3 assists with others and it becomes embarrassing! Nani has 18 assists,  Fabregas 13, Baines, a left back, 11, Brunt, for newly promoted West Brom, 11,  Etheringon (who has scored 5) 8,  Yaya Toure 7, and Adam, in Blackpool's pub team, 7!

But Parker is a holding midfielder, his job is to stop the opposition scoring! Ouch, we have shipped 58 goals this season, which is why we face relegation! Parker has also been booked 7 times, the joint highest of any player at the club.

Look at the Cups and Gardner has helped Birmingham to a trophy whilst Etherington has played a leading role in getting Stoke through to a Cup Final.

Nolan's contribution, unquestionably is the difference between Newcastle staying up and going down. Add his 12 goals and 7 assists to our total and we wouldn't be going down. Exchange Parker's 8 for Nolan's 19 and Newcastle would be in the drop zone, without question.

The contenders amongst the midfielders should have been Nani, Etherington, Gardner, Adam, Toure and Nolan and the Newcastle man should have carried off the gong on the basis of inspiration and influence, the very things that Parker is praised for.

Where would we be with Nolan in our team? Mid table.

22 comments:

Cyprus-Toon said...

So why has he won it then?? Simple answer is, all the journo's down South obviously think, just like Capello, that Hadrian's wall is just North of the M62 & any team playing that side play in the SPL....

This North/South divide is pathetic & ridiculous!!!

Stani Army said...

Lol. Comes out fighting. Let the battle commence

lexicon9391 said...

Strange piece HF...I normally agree with most of what you say but anyone who has watched Parker for West Ham will know he deserves the award. I believe all the more so because we are near the bottom of the table. Of course assists are lower because unless Cole et al get everything laid on a plate from 3 yards out they will miss...indeed against Wolves Cole even managed to miss exactly that sort of chance...if it wasn't for Zubar's knee we would have probably buckled in that game too. Also it is important to consider the context of tackles and blocks...how many of Parker's have been goal saving rather than in the relative safety of mid-field. Bringing energy and committment to a good team like Man U is easy...good players around you...makes life so much easier. Parker not only does that for a genuinely awful team like ours but what integrity...playing after the death of his father, giving his all each week even tho he could be playing champions league with Spurs. Its also nice that its gone to someone who doesn't feign injury, who doesn't dive and who plays the game hard but honestly gets rewarded. Do we really want cheats like Etherington, Young and Nani to gain from their antics. There will always be arguments about the right choice for these awards and Nolan and Adam also have good cases but even tho I am biased I think its gone to the right player.

USA Dave said...

HF, may I appeal to your cynical and capitalistic side?

We are down. We can't beat a frigging egg. Our manager is a nitwit. Our owners and their sidekick are antiquated, useless fools. We will need to sell Parker in a matter of weeks.

And the price just went up.

Stani Army said...

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/sport/sportvideo/footballvideo/8468215/West-Hams-Scott-Parker-goes-from-MacDonalds-advert-to-player-of-the-year.html

Stani Army said...

Mail's saying that ONeil's career's in the balance after the tackle from Reo-Coker. Not sure how much to believe as in the same article, they refer to ONeil as a defender.

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/sport/football/article-1379536/West-Hams-Gary-ONeil-consider-legal-action-Nigel-Reo-Coker-career-hangs-balance.html?ito=feeds-newsxml

Deane said...

once again you're wrong there is no player in the world that shows the anywhere near the same prowess at performing the perfect pirouette

Anonymous said...

So I am not the only one thats not convinced about Parker!!!

Sav said...

How much of a fool you must feel deep down HF for not recognising what a great player Scott Parker is. Moreover, you went on for a long time admiring Mark Noble. There you have it. Drop Noble and put a real reliable midfielder next to Parker and you have a winning proposition.

So, rather than picking on Parker against all opinion you would do a good service to West Ham by calling for Noble to be dropped in the next five games. Anyone would do. Boa or Collison would be my choice.

Anonymous said...

Shut up HF, it's about the most influential player and when Parker doesn't play, quite simply, we lose.

Anonymous said...

I don't know if your being sarcastic but I agree w this column. Parker is overrated. Sell him while his injured stock is high.

Hammersfan said...

Why did he win it? Because the press bought their own story! Scotty has been Mr Miracle Man all season as far as the press are concerned and they have swallowed their own lines. The stats don't lie!

Anonymous said...

How about goal scoring and assissting isn't his job you moron? You bleat constantly about how he is a defensive midfielder, so look up his tackling rate (the highest in our team), pass completion (the highest in our team). Your hatred of Parker is pathetic HF and you are clearly not grateful that he has single handedly given us even a chance of staying up.

Hammersfan said...

I don't hate Parker, but I don't think he is player of the year. Here's another stat. Parker has committed 40 fouls apparently, that's 4 more than Joey Barton. How many of those fouls have resulted in goals against us? It is true that Parker has made 116 tackles and has a high success rate at 77% but the players around him in that particular table are Lucas (147 tackles) Vaughan of Blackpool (121 with the same completion rate as Parker), Holden of Bolton (117) and Alcaraz of Wigan (110). I include the clubs of some of those in case you don't know who they are! None of those would be in the frame for Player of the Year would they? Pass completion is a pointless stat because so many passes are short, sideways and backwards. For example, Wigan have clocked up 9950"successful" passes and Blackpool 10202 but Everton only 9597 and Bolton just 7226. Assists is far more relevant! However, for the record, the top five for passing are Murphy 2050 (80%), Essien (87%), Ferguson 1855 (81%), Adam 1681 (72%) and Clichy 1624 (80%). So Parker aint in the top 5 there either is he?

Hammersfan said...

Sorry, Essien has made 1938 passes!

RexHammer said...

To be honest mate, The reason he has been awarded the title is because he has single handedly carried a team on his own. If his team mates was better and showed half the passion that he did, then he would have more goals and most likely more assists. A lot of his fouls have been down to him covering for his team mates mistakes.

I do agree to an extent that he does not deserve it and someone like Nani or Nasri deserves it, but oh well it is most probably because he is English and they are trying to promote his name so that he can actually play in the England squad on a regular basis. 2 times he has played for England and both times he was basically man of the match.

Hammersfan said...

The site is looking good Rex, well done. Hope all is well with the family now mate.

RexHammer said...

Thanks a lot mate, Really appreciate it. Wish I could post as often as you, But I really struggle with ideas to post.

The Family alright mate, My son come out of hospital like he was not even sick in the first place. Keep it up mate....Love the blog.

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They didn't get in wrong in the past and they have not got it wrong this time either - you must feel gutted and a little humiliated for getting it so royally wrong.

Anonymous said...

the silence is deafening

Anonymous said...

21;51 an illustrious list to be sure, he doesn't look out of place there either, just goes to show what HF knows, absolutely nothing. Mwwwwaaahhhhaaaaahhhhaaaaaaaa

Hammersfan said...

LOL sorry, I had moved on. Didn't get it wrong in the past? Illustrious list? Really? Including Kenny Burns? Steve Nicol? Tony Book? Steve Perryman? Yep, they have given it to no marks in the past, but at least those guys WON something the season they were named Player of the Year!