Saturday 11 June 2011

Player of the Year on the Cheap - Any Takers?

Dear God, what is going on exactly? Henderson has joined Liverpool for £20million, Phil Jones is off to Man Utd for £16.5million, Unreal City are lining up a £30million plus bid for Modric and are rumoured to want £50million plus for Tevez, Young is joining the United half of Manchester for £20million...and meanwhile Scotty is on holiday and nobody seems terribly interested.

So how does this work exactly? If he really was Player of the Year, why aren't clubs queueing around the block for Vice Captain Fantastic, Mr West Ham, the heartbeat of our relegated team? The highest figure I've heard for Parker so far in £10million, a fraction of the figures being paid for players who, apparently, trailed in his footballing wake all season.

How can we make sense of all this? Could it be that the journalists got it wrong when they voted for Scotty? Well, Vorderman has just won Rear of the Year, leaving Pippa Middleton behind, which seems like a bum deal to me. It just shows that those making these decisions don't know their arses from their elbows!

Come on now. Anybody want Scotty? Just 193,000 miles on the clock, three careful owners. Nice little runner, turns on a sixpence. Anybody? Anybody other than 'Arry? Come on, there must be somebody who wants him, this guy is the Player of the Year for Christ's sake!

Ah well, like Pippa's arse, I'm sure Scotty will look good in white!

12 comments:

Stani said...

Why do you have to disrespect her like that HF?

Hammersfan said...

Disrespect who, Vorderman? Her arse isn't a patch on Pippa's!

Hammersfan said...

By the way Stani, you scoffed at the idea of Liverpool paying £20m for Henderson!

Stani said...

Yeh I know HF! Bonkers init!? Or do you think he's worth it? Comolli at his best! Sunderland must be loving it. 24 for Bent and 20 for Henderson hahaaaa!

Anonymous said...

I know you don't like scotty but seriously, you really are a twat.

Of course this won't be published just like every other time I try to reply to the shit you spout.

Travelling Hammer said...

One thinks one is too obsessed with Scottie! Please move on to some informed debate about preparation for our escape (upwards) from the Championship. Who knows maybe Scottie will win the plaudits in the lower division as he fails to get his big move over the summer. Congrats by the way on becoming a hits millionaire

Hammersfan said...

Cheers TH. To be fair, this is about what is happening in the transfer market - which is mad - usng the coat hanger of Scotty to make it West Ham related. Oh and a protest against Vorderman getting that award over Pippa. Outrageous decision no doubt made for fear of upsetting the Royals by nomiting the future Queen's sister "a perfect arse"!

2035, I publish EVERY comment unless it is racist or includes the F or C word, and even a few F words have slipped through if the rest of the "post" has some sort of merit.

beelzebub said...

Well....at this early stage we might well be looking at parker in the championship...a nice interview on talk sport is claiming WHU want £8m for him and no one is interested.

So the reality is, either some player + deal is done or scotty needs to lower his expectation of where hes playing next year...or we pay £70k per week !! for him in the championship.

Not good news for us, also we offered £1.5m for Nolan....what an insult.

Our board are total tossers, there is no other way to sum them up, the BA contract alone requires someone to be sacked...guess it was all Grant's fault again... their usual excuse for their own incompetence

Hammersfan said...

LOL well said Lord of the Flies

USA Dave said...

Beelz, do we really know the deal with Ba's contract? It seems a huge mystery. Can he go for free? If so, why the complaint over Sunderland? Maybe that was a technicality since itbwas in May and his deal was valid until June 1? Truth is, we have no idea probably.

Look, Id love to see him stay. I think he would score goals in the N. But its very easy to take a short period of success and turn it into something more. At the end of the day, he was with us for only 13 games. He failed two medicals, although it seems those tests didnt correlate to his actual ability on the pitch. And of the 7 he scored, 4 were against Wigan and West Brom. Its not like he has a long track record of success in England. So whatever happens with him happens.

As for Scotty, I believe he will be with us when pre season training begins. He may even play a game or two before Spuds up their bid to our liking. It will be a game of chicken and my money is on Sam to outwit good ol' Arry.

Im just letting you all know that I will be in full rationalization mode until the season starts. Ive had enough depression and gloom with our team.

Anonymous said...

HF have you thought that their prices are due to age and potential? (Bent aside but that was to stave off relegation)Parker is 30 and has a few good years left in him not the 10 years the others have. Also It is easy to be a big fish in the little pond of minnows we had in the side this year and I think most managers are looking at his time at Chelski and Newcastle and are thinking he can't cut it when in with the big boys which as a manager you need to think about where as a football writer votes for a stand out player which he was by a mile.

Hammersfan said...

Yes i have mate. In fact, if you apply a formula to Henderson's fee of £2million per season he will keep playing at the top, it works out at the £20million Liverpool have paid for him. That would give a figure of £6m tops for Parker given his age.

This article is intended to highlght the absurdity of some of the fees being paid at the moment and to show, through the decision re Voderman's arse, how subjective opinion is no way of measuring accurately.

A true Player of the Year would be commanding a fee of £20million plus.