Friday 26 November 2010

West Ham Open Ticket Office in Queens Market

"Roll up, roll up, for the deal of the century. I'm not giving you one porn dvd for a score my loverly ladies, I'm not giving you two porn dvds for a score, I'm not even giving you three porn dvds for a score, I'm giving you five, yes five, porn dvds for a score! Come on luv, open that purse, I'm robbin' myself blind 'ere. Tell you what, one, two, three, four, five porn dvds for a score, and I'll throw in a dildo. No? Plume de ma tante! Come on my luv, you're killing me 'ere. Tell you what, one, two, three, four, five porn dvds, a dildo, a pair of crotchless, see through panties and...'ere, I'll throw in a ticket for the Wigan game for free!"

"What's that luv, what's in the porn dvds? Loyal season ticket holders being shafted luv, shafted good and proper!"

7 comments:

Anonymous said...

Crotchless and see through?

Hammersfan said...

Yes. Don't you have a pair?

Anonymous said...

i dont care because i got me man utd and wigan tickets for twenty squids. :-) lovely jubilee.

Anonymous said...

Even at £20 don't suppose you are going?

Anonymous said...

I do, but they're see-through so I can't find 'em. I hope I still haven't got 'em on.

Headmaster said...

2106 - you don't care eh? About right. I do care. I care enough to have had a season ticket for the last decade. I care enough to have bought my son a season ticket for the last 7 years. I care because I can see the long game here, not just the 'I got me Wigan tickets for twenty quid' short term philosophy.
There are currently thousands of season tickets who, like me, must be considering what the hell the point is in shelling out a grand every summer and then suffering the spectacle of increasingly poor football prostituted out for a few measely quid by the pron barons. Think about it.

John said...

It certainly does seem a very short sighted attitude that is becoming more and more desperate with each poor performance to fill the ground for the next match. Surprisingly how many season ticket holder's will renew next year appears to be beyond immediate concern