Wednesday, 24 August 2011

Finding Mido

The Game may well be quiet for the next week as I go in search of Mido. After very careful analysis, it has dawned on me that our relegation had nothing to do with Zola, Avram or the Dildo Boys. The truth of the matter is that Mido brought with him the curse of Tutankhamun and our only hope of reversing our fortunes is to bring the overweight Egyptian back to Upton Park for a ritual sacrifice.

And so it is that I am risking life and limb, cruising the Nile for seven nights and eight days, desperately seeking Mido. If I can access the internet, I will update on my progress and the fortunes of West Ham Wanderers but otherwise, all the best until my return!

18 comments:

Stani said...

Make sure you learn something about the people and culture too HF

Anonymous said...

Enjoy your holiday mate. At least you will not have to watch Forest end our silly dreams of promotion. I'm sure they are another one of our many bogey teams. I still remember the 4 nil stuff'n in the semi's when Gale was sent off.

Hammersfan said...

Cheers guys. I will do my best Stani but the programme looks pretty whistle stop.

Guido Martillo said...

Forest? Bolton? Leeds? Cardiff?
Are any teams not actually bogeymen for our lot?

jimwhu said...

hopefully when you come back we might have a few new players ive a funny feeling el hadj dioff might be one of them and maybe barton so things shouldnt change much we should be making front page headlines again im sure all this bidding weve done for long maynard etc is just a front to maybe out of desperation bring them in after the window closes as they are both looking to be released by there clubs and the dildo brothers can justify getting two players free off charge after the windows close remind mido hes contracted to try out all the local pie and mash shops before the olympics start enjoy your break hf

Deane said...

You could always spend a few days with some friends of mine in Cairo you'll learn a lot and they're very welcoming and they don't have internet access which would please a lot of people

Andy said...

Egypt? In August?? Good luck mate, send back any charred remains through the post!

John said...

Wouldn't look too hard for Mido HF I understand that Gypo Tummy can be quit unpleasant in those parts.

Stani said...

Couldn't you go for a bit longer and neglect your fantasy team?

Plans his holiday around his fantasy team! I'm gonna enjoy beating you HF. :)

Anonymous said...

Personally I think you should have handed the reins to Stani as I don't think he could do any worse.

Anonymous said...

you lot really know nothing what so ever about football

Anonymous said...

slut!

Mike said...

Have a good holiday mate! :)

Anonymous said...

http://www.talksport.co.uk/radio/kickoff/blog/2011-08-26/poll-what-would-you-prefer-scott-parker-%C2%A37m-or-joey-barton-free see I told you who's best

MKD4EVA said...

England's brightest forward talent has just joined­ a Championship club (no disrespect). Almost every Premier League­ manager outside Manchester, Anfield and SW6 should be­ sacked.

This phenomenon will play for England and­ keep playing.

A natural goalscorer, he hangs on­ the last defender like Michel Own-plus, then, with his­ pace and low centre of gravity, skips past to score,­ time and time again.

I say "Owen-plus",­ because the next minute he is a scoring threat from 25­ yards, as often as not from dead balls.

Then again,­ if he decides instead to run from deep, you find­ yourself thinking, "hold on; Carlos Tevez has had­ a haircut!"

This is the best player ever that­ nobody has heard of!

....and we're gutted he went for so little.

ENJOY

Sav said...

I don't mean this in a bad way HF, but perhaps you should stay abroad a little longer. The team is doing great without you. We just won 1-4 away to Nottingham Forest!

AJ said...

thank god you don't work for me. you're one of those horrible people for whom 5 weeks isn't enough - you take your holiday around a bank holiday - nasty.

Stani said...

Is that a compliment 14:49? :)

Welcome back HF.