Monday 7 February 2011

Faubert's Final Faux Pas?

Well I didn't nickname him Faux Pas without good reason! The guy is a walking sulk and a footballing accident waiting to happen. Could you find anybody more Gallic? He looks like he has a Gauloises permanently hanging from his bottom lip and is always just a shrug of the shoulders away from suggesting he doesn't give a toss.

Well his passion and commitment to the cause were demonstrated perfectly yesterday when he flounced off after discovering he wasn't in the first team squad. Stay and watch the game? Why would he? What a yawn! Football? Pah! He can't abide the game. No wonder he fell asleep on the Real Madrid bench, the whole business of football is just so damn boring and tedious!

Of course, the press have gone overboard with the "whole club is rocked" by his walkout nonsense. I suspect the David's are secretly delighted because it means they can save themselves £80k by docking Le Sulk two week's wages.

And as for the other players, not seeing Faux Pas' miserable mug on the bench must have been a positive fillip!

23 comments:

el martillo said...

Are you not a connousseur (how the hell do you spell that?) of French whine? I feel a bit sorry for him actually, he's quite clearly a wing back and has never been utilised as such. If we had kept Daprella I thing a back line with Upson tidying up behind the youthful da Costa and Tomkins and wing backs might have provided a decent platform for Noble and Parker in midfield with Diamanti just in beind Cole and a proper goalscorer. What do you think?

Anonymous said...

SwissHammer says..

It seems that the excuse is that his child was sick so he went home, but without permission!!!! Why do we attract these players?

Also HF, did you hear the the WHU curse has hit again! Keane is injured already!!

Hammersfan said...

Wing backs, three centre backs? You'll be calling for the introduction of a faith healer to solve our injury problems next and putting the players on a Shredded Wheat diet.

Stani Army said...

I think the newspapers are making more of it than there is. Wasn't in the squad so decided to go home to his sick child.

"Upson tidying up behind the youthful Da Costa"?...you'd get barred on WHTID for language like that Marty. Interesting description of Da Costa ;)

HF, can you tidy up the twitter feed box with the instructions I sent please? Or I'll tell Ofsted I will.

Stani Army said...

Did you send Carlton that fitness tweet HF?

Hammersfan said...

Be patient, snowed under with work at moment and with demands for help from the offspring! Yes I did. Did he reply?

Deane said...

wish he'd let me know cos he certainly made the right decision

el martillo said...

I see what you mean Stani, but I think Dale's more likely to invite me round for a cup of tea and a sausage sandwich!

el martillo said...

It's connoisseur! I got u and i muddled up. Didn't a few people on the Org. have that problem?

Stani Army said...

HF,
Na he hasnt. Not sure what their policy is. Maybe the clubs got something in place telling them not to reply to fans. You should have made out you were some nice young female!

As for the changes; they're minor, shouldnt take too long. In your own time.

Marty,
Hahahaha

Stani Army said...

Hitz is back playing. First game for reserves this Wed against Brom.

http://www.guardian.co.uk/football/2011/feb/07/west-ham-thomas-hitzlsperger

Soon we'll have:

.........Keane....Ba/Cole
Obinna........Hitz....Collison/Dyer
.............Parker
Bridge..DaCosta..Tomkins..Jacobsen
..............Green

That has to be our strongest side surely? If that team doesnt escape this predicament then there's something wrong.

el martillo said...

Stani, thankyou for your kind comments on my Ofsted inspection report. You can sit in the garden with a lemonade and a bag of ready salted if you like, but I'm afraid lunchtime trips to the pub were compulsory when I was in the sixth form!

Hang on; DYER, I think your in need of a stiff one my friend if you think he's ever going to make a telling contribution!

John said...

HF (20.06) Why not? They are obviously bankrupt of any other ideas.A diet of shredded wheat would obviously do McCarthy a power of good, well, according to 'Beefy'anyway.
Seriously I have had to study the power of the mind over the physical body. for example 'I have cancer and I am going to die' or 'I have cancer and I am going to beat it' who lives the longest, or an attitude of 'we are going to win its impossible for us to lose this game'or 'it will be good if we win but if we lose it does 't really matter we still get paid'
The above are crass examples of what I am trying to say, but I think you will get the gist of what I consider is missing with our team

Hammersfan said...

Marty! Stop trying to encourage Stani to defect to Dale's site: a stiff one indeed!

But far worse than that, you've used the wrong "you're". Hang your head in shame, your standards are slipping and OFSTED will have words!

John, I do. What's missing is belief, desire, guts, hunger, passion and balls. And stamina, ability, intelligence and organisation whilst we are about it!

el martillo said...

Oh my God, the shame, the shame, the ignomoney and shame! HF, please accept my resignation with imediate effect and sinsere apolergies for my apauling behaviour. OK lads. I am just going outside and may be some time.

Stani Army said...

I had a feeling it was you Marty. Bloody hell, what sixth form did you go to? We did have a pavilion at our school (Langdon). It was like a mini pub inside...we used to call it pubvilion. Used it during school cricket matches but only when we played the posh blokes otherwise the pubvilion was off limits to us.

You do know I dont drink fizzy drinks either :)

Dyer's alright. How about Boa then? He does enjoy a hard tackle from behind so maybe you'd prefer that? :)

HF,
Did I not mention to you before that Dale had banned me? I never go there...ahem.

I think I know why so many people make that 'your' 'you're' mistake HF....and probably why you don't. It's become common since the advent of mobile phones and texting (The 'your' and 'youre' in text speak is the same i.e 'ur'). You probably hardly text and when you do, it's full words typed using the index finger :)

Hammersfan said...

Banned you? Why did he ban you? Tory Boy trying to ban Asians? Unheard of surely? What did you do?

Smarty said...

I can't use that as an excuse I'm afraid Stani, I'm afraid I'm just bleedin' illiterate. Mind you I do know how to use an apostrophe! I can't tell you which school I went to I'm afraid, I still haven't given in all my homework; but I do believe it's been in Ofsted's top 20 every year!

Stani Army said...

HF,
I said he was having a "hissy fit" and he said that that term was homophobic. So he banned me....after ganging up on me with Headmaster, Matt Ryan and Chandos! :) Hahahaha, serious, it's a true story!.

Smarty,
Top 10 had you handed in your homework!

Hammersfan said...

Headmaster? Really? Seems like a reasonable guy on here. What did you say to provoke them? Own up! Can only gay guys have hissy fits then?

Stani Army said...

Me provocative? Never. Headmaster's come around a lot. He alright he is. What could possible get on Iain's nerves? Criticising his favourite player perhaps?

Seems that way. Straight guy's just get p*ssed off I guess.

Did you watch the u-21 game HF? They're shown live on the FA site.

Hammersfan said...

Now what's that apostrophe in guy's for? Criticise Noble one more time and you're banned! ; }

Stani Army said...

I knew you'd throw a hissy fit over that apostrophe. I'm just making up for Marty. Not once did I criticise Noble's looks...not once. You know if Iain caught wind of you having a topless photo of Noble on your site (as you have), he'd be over here in a jiffy (rephrase?)