Was Parker knocking off Behrami's wife?

So was Parker knocking off Behrami's wife? It might explain why Scotty suddenly came over all "cool" with that new foppish haircut and why Valedictory was suddenly so keen to leave, his wife fleeing to Italy ahead of him.

What evidence do I have to support the idea? Absolutely none, other than Avram saying that Scotty is just like John Terry! What more evidence do you need?

Freud could write a whole book based on what Avram has had to say about Parker:

"Some want to do it but are shy." I bet!
"I encourage it because players are not computers." And nor are managers eh Avram? Nudge, nudge, wink, wink, a massage parlour is as good as a doctor's surgery to the morally blind.
"You must let them express themselves." If you say so Avram.

Who knows, perhaps that's how the players bonded before Behrami left? Ok guys, Behrami's bint is in the changing room, bent over and thinking of Italy, so form a queue. As our best player, Scotty gets first dibs! Carlton, you're last. You're sure to miss and leave a mess that others might slip up on! Kieron, best sit this one out, we don't need another groin strain. Yes, Benni, it is fine to do that instead if you are hungry. Rob, try not to pick her up, we can't afford a legal action if you drop her. Manuel, no punching. Matty? What are you doing? Pull up your trousers and stand up straight man, this is the one time this season that it's not you who is being shafted! Freddie, close your eyes and read the Beano...

Mind you, Avram did say something else that was very interesting. Talking aboout Scotty's rallying of the troops at half time against West Brom, Grant added, "It's not the first time that has happened to me." You do wonder why this guy is paid a wage don't you?