West Ham Team For Wigan

The knee jerk response after that shocking performance at Liverpool is, shoot the lot of them. Upson was awful; drop him. Spector was useless; drop him. Cole was virtually anonymous; drop him. Kovac only completed one forward pass all game; drop him. Noble did nothing; drop him. Behrami never made it into the final third of the pitch; drop him. Stanislas couldn't get a corner above ankle height of the first defender; drop him. Green's distribution was even worse than usual; drop him. Ilan never managed a shot all game; drop him. Faubert can stay because we don't expect that much and he didn't disappoint; no, sod it, drop him.

Da Costa can stay, he at least looked like he WANTED to be out there!

But of course, we can't drop all of them. If we did, we might have to pick Mido!

No, somehow we have to make a silk purse out of the sow's ears that Duxbury, Nani and Zola have collected together in what is laughably called a Premiership squad. This ensemble of recorder players, maracas shakers and triangle tinklers were going to orchestrate our bid for a European tour at the start of the season if you remember. What a joke!

So what do we do? Is Ilunga available? Is Ilunga still alive anybody? He's probably still well enough to bank the salary but he doesn't seem too anxious to get out on the pitch. Unless he has upset Zola too!

Diamanti anybody? What has happened there then? Something stinks. Ilan says the Italian speaking players are out of control and simultaneously Diamanti is dropped or left out with a mystery injury. You don't have to be Hercule Poirot do you? But Zola must not be allowed to endanger our Premiership status by leaving out our second highest scorer. I don't care if there has been an argument, we need Diamanti so Zola can swallow his bloody pride. Hopefully he might choke on it!

What about the left back berth? Well, ironically, Spector played well in the last home game against Sunderland. The trouble is, the Wigan players like to run with the ball and, if at left back, I can see Spector giving away a penalty. Based on that challenge in the box against Liverpool, we also need to avoid Behrami tackling in our penalty area! Full back? No chance! If Diamanti plays on the left, we need a proper left back, so I suppose that means Daprela. Zola has used him as a sub in the last two games! Parker returns so Zola has the following selection choices:

1) Who does Parker replace?
2) Who plays at left back?
3) Who plays up front alongside Cole?
4) Does Diamanti return?

I expect to see the following team:

Green
Faubert, Da Costa, Upson, Spector
Noble, Kovac, Parker, Behrami,
Franco, Cole

My team would read:

Green
Faubert, Da Costa, Upson, Daprela
Behrami, Noble, Parker,
Diamanti
Franco, Cole

What ever team Zola picks, we desperately need to win. Hull WILL beat Sunderland today. Hull will get a point at Wigan. And Hull may well get a point at home to Liverpool. We need to stay 3 points ahead of them today. Still, if we desperately need a goal with ten minutes to play, Zola could always send on Boa and Mido!

And if we do win and Bent puts Sunderland to the sword, I will have the best Saturday night I've had all season: the wife has been warned to expect a very personal version of the London Marathon. Never mind Kashmire, cue the Ride of the Valkyries!