Friday, 21 October 2011

Here comes Frankenstein's Monster!

It was always inevitable. You appoint Doctor Evil and it is only a matter of time before you will have a stable of evil bastards, all spitting fury. Diop and Faye were the outriders, crude mechanicals paving the way for the arrival of the sperm, or phlegm, of Satan.

And so it comes to pass that a shadow has fallen across Chadwell Heath. The gates of Hell have creaked open and a fiend has slipped out, its throat clogged with bile and its forked tail poking unapologetically out of its arse.

Strange lamentations are heard in the air and a falcon, towering in her pride of place, is, by a mousing owl hawk'd at and kill'd. By the clock tis day, and yet dark night strangles the travelling lamp. Is it night's predominance or the day's shame, that darkness does the face of earth entomb, when living light should kiss it?

The creature opens its dull yellow eye and approaches Allardyce, muttering the words, "You are my father!"

Watch out, there's a spitting Diouf about!

9 comments:

Mike said...

If it happens, this would officially be the worst signing in the history of West Ham.

US HF said...

This would be a catastrophic event I cannot say I am surprised to say the very least. Maybe twitter blasting DG to pull his head out of his arse will help

Darrenharry said...

No no Mike, I saw Mitchell Thomas live.

Hammersfan said...

LOL Good point Darren, so did I! In fact, if memory serves me rightly, and it may not, I think I saw him score an own goal against his old employers at Luton in a 1-0 defeat. That's yet another shit player who Tottenham offloaded onto West Ham! Bought for £500,000 sold for £50,000 - says it all! Here's my arse Tottenham, please shaft it!

Macbeth said...

.. "And must they all be hanged that swear and spit?"

Hammersfan said...

LOL What you egg!

Mike said...

I'd rather have Marco Boogers back.

jimwhu said...

if we back dr evil then if he thinks dioff will do well for us then we should get off his back and let him get off his job and sign who he wants i remember seeing john radford no goals in 29 matches and titi camara surely hel do better than either of them

Mike said...

John Radford, lol.

But with regards to Diouf, I would stick my neck out and say the majority of fans are unhappy because of his character, not his footballing ability.